7 Adoption Goals for 2016

What will you give back to adoption this year?

Sarah M. Baker January 01, 2016

Whether it is losing weight, spending time with family, cleaning out your closet, quitting a bad habit, traveling more, or maybe volunteering; every year we see people making New Year’s resolutions. The common theme is usually somehow bettering oneself. I have a lot of things I’d love to work on this year, and adoption is one of my top areas I can improve upon. One thing I run into a lot in adoption support communities are people who also are looking to improve the role adoption plays in their lives. When I reflected on 2015 and previous years, I started thinking about the good life I owe, in part, to adoption. So what can I give back to adoption?

What goals can we, as members of the adoption community, set for ourselves in 2016?

Finding Balance
1. Finding Balance

Adoption can be one of those tricky balancing acts. While you want your child to be secure and understand his or her adoption story, talking about adoption every day can be overwhelming. Balancing your normalcy while including adoption in your life is a goal many adoptive families strive for.

Love No Matter What
2. Love No Matter What

Some adoptions aren’t picture perfect. Sometimes people have to accept that their children’s birth parents aren’t in the same place as them. This may mean loving them can sometimes be difficult. If they are making poor choices that you don’t agree with, it doesn’t mean condoning those choices, but rather loving and accepting them regardless.

Growing Relationships
3. Growing Relationships

While it’s no secret I LOVE adoption, it doesn’t mean I don’t have my own set of goals or things I’d like to improve upon. My relationship with my son’s birth parents is wonderful . . . but every great relationship still needs work! I’d love to continue growing our open adoption relationship with better communication and getting to know them more on a personal level.

Keep in Contact
4. Keep in Contact

As time passes, we may forget to stay in contact as often as we’d like. Jobs, children’s activities, school work, friends, and family all play a role in letting time slip by. If you have a goal of getting in contact more often, you can set an appointment on your calendar as a reminder.

Being Patient
5. Being Patient

Sometimes adoption is tough. If you are waiting to adopt or awaiting finalization, giving yourself a little grace when you have moments of panic (or total freakout) is a good gift. Be patient with yourself and those around you. No one ever claimed adoption was easy . . . at least not anyone who has actually taken that journey.

Leaping Over Hurdles
6. Leaping Over Hurdles

Embrace the hiccups that can be thrown your way in adoption. Whether it’s a failed placement, a financial hurdle, a bump in the open adoption relationship or other trials, take a moment to regroup and then get back on the saddle.

Back on Track
7. Back on Track

One of the most common adoption goals I have seen from people in support groups surround the relationship they have with their children’s birth parents. Whether they are at fault or the birth parent has withdrawn, getting the triad on track for a healthy relationship is so important.

My Goals
9. My Goals

My top adoption goals for 2016 are to broaden my relationship with my son’s birth family, obtain pictures of them from their childhood to share with my son over time, work on my own personal insecurities in my role as his mother, and in general continue striving for open adoption education at Heart For Open Adoption.

What are your adoption goals for 2016 and how will you make sure your goals are reached?

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Sarah M. Baker

Sarah is a Staff Storyteller for Adoption.com and passionate about teaching others the power of open adoption. She is very active in the adoption community, where she spends a lot of time advocating as the founder of Heart For Open Adoption. She is the mom of two boys in addition to parenting her niece. She is a mother biologically and through domestic infant open adoption. Sarah promotes adoption education and ethical adoptions. She and her husband were featured on Season 2 of Oxygen’s “I’m Having Their Baby,” which tells the story of their first adoption match failing. Sarah hopes to bring her personal experience to you and help anyone who wants more information about adoption to find it with ease. Though it was once a taboo subject, Sarah hopes to make adoption something people are no longer afraid to talk about. You can learn more about Sarah and her family on her blog.

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