Facing an unplanned pregnancy humbled me beyond anything other experience in my life. I never had any close encounters with adoption before this, so my adoption journey seems confusing. The further I got into the pregnancy, however, the clearer it became that this sweet boy was not to be raised by me.
Let’s start with logic. I was working part-time, minimum wage. Barely making enough to feed me and keep a roof over my head. Let alone if something happened to my car or if there was a medical problem. I didn’t even have health insurance at this time. Statistically speaking, having a child while living in poverty, the chances of staying in poverty are pretty high.
Being a single mother isn’t ideal, while it’s possible and I know many people who are single parents (and wonderful at being a single parent) I couldn’t help but think this child needed two.
Another point of view, if the birth father decided to accept responsibility and co-parent (marriage was out of the question), my child would live in a broken home. I didn’t know the birth father very well, but I knew enough about him to know that his lifestyle was not compatible with caring for a child. If he played his cards right, I wouldn’t have a choice and would have to allow my child to be raised by him.
Less logical, but just as important, was how I felt about it all. I didn’t have any close connection to adoption before I became a birth mom.
I walked into the agency soon after learning I was pregnant. This agency does more than adoption, they help single and pregnant women. I walked in looking for help, they helped me find an ObGyn, get health insurance, food in my cupboards, counseling. They helped.
Soon, they recommended I attend a weekly group counseling of other single and pregnant women or women who have previously been single and pregnant. I wasn’t alone, for the first time I felt like people understood what I was feeling. Adoption became the more and more obvious choice. So allow me to tell you why it was right for me.
It was right for me because I was broke, barely employed, emotionally unstable, and wanting a better life for my child. I knew it was the right choice for me because I found a couple that so desperately wanted a child, and was willing to accept not only my son but me into their lives. Even now, 8 years later, I’m even more part of their family than I ever have been. It was right for me because I became a mother the moment I found out I was pregnant, and, to me, a good mother does whatever she can to provide the best life for her children, even if it’s hardest for her.
Are you considering adoption and want to give your child the best life possible? Let us help you find an adoptive family that you love. Visit Adoption.org or call 1-800-ADOPT-98.