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I am identifying the many threads or themes that make up my life right now. It is this way for everyone - no one lives a mono-thread life. Although one theme will come to the forefront and be the dominant thread for a moment, day, month, season, whatever. It is good for the sake of knowing my own life to identify and name the threads:
The spiritual thread (and this has several sub-themes). I think this is the most important one to me. At the core I am a lover and seeker of God, though I am a bit lost right now. Subthemes are rebuilding my relationship with God; How I will reengage in the local church; How to communicate God's love to those who don't know Him and only see Him in terms of church going; my woundedness from being a female leader in the church and all of the mixed up teaching and practice with that one; my quest to be an authentic Christ-follower. This is the topic that caused me to put an entry on "private". And there will probably be a few more private entries with this one as I rant and work through things, sometimes using names and specific institutions. I don't want to hurt anyone but I NEED to process my stuff.
Adoption theme - this too has a couple subthemes: the search and processing being reliquished. Although I don't think the relinquishment was as traumatic as the home I went to. But that first abandonment may have created circumstances in my second family.
Recovering from childhood trauma is another theme.
My depression and how it affects my life.
My professional life.
Each of the relationships developed on the forum - though I don't write about them here. Intimacy is a private thing. And I am blessed with many delightful relationships.
My drinking problem. The jury is still out on whether I am an alcoholic, but I certainly have been drinking too much. It is fascinating to me how much emotion this can evoke from friends. Some out of their panic of what may happen to me others rationalizing for me perhaps out of their fear of where they may be at and much in between. Very volitile!
My relationship with amom.
I think that covers the major themes running through my life at the moment. . .Just needed an index for myself to organize this life of mine. Now I can do a regular entry . . . silly girl!