Happy Mother's day to all

This is a day late of course, cause I am playing hookie from my intense writing schedule...but thank God I've got an intense writing schedule...wee hoo. So Happy Mother's day to some of my favorite mothers :-) Ok...so Mother's Day....the good :-) My mom was awesome, she seems to be doing much better in my sister's rule restrictive household and is not allowed to spiral out of control as she was in my hippie abode where a single mom tried to write day and night, lovingly parent a child and tend to a person who slept until my baby went to bed and stayed up all night asking for me to help her with things while I tried to write....this is after spending the day parenting my child...and we are talking til 3am and beyond. So mom is maybe not happier at my sister's but she is much healthier there and it shows. I am so much happier having my life back and I am slowly trying to make peace of our home again. Aria...is a remarkable person. She is so loving, so kind, so empathetic and smart it is unbelievable. She is now in day care (YEAHHHH WEE HOOO) and mommie can finally write during the day. It was really hard at first but she has grown to love the single father who takes care of her during the day. His wife died some years ago and he parents his only son. He is a fost/adopt dad with one Foster child and a daycare where he watches another 15 month old and does after school care. I felt reluctant to put Aria in the "den of men" but she seems to be thriving and other than HMG she doesn't have any men in her life so this is good for her. The sweet thing is her daycare provider bought her a doll and whenever she goes to daycare she signs "baby" and points to him. He knows she means the doll he gave her so he gets it for her and she screams for joy. I can leave her knowing she is well cared for and go home and write. :-) When she comes home I am so happy to see her, she gets much more "happy mommie time" than "pretending to be happy mommie time" now than she ever has. I have funny pictures of HMG and Aria on myspace now from a bbq this last week. That being said. We had Mother's day at my sister's and it was great. Ari was just wounderful! and gave my mom a bajillion hugs which she needed. TT's inlaws were there and her sister and brother in law. It was fun...but sadly not MY FAMILY and I realized this mother's day that "Mother's Day" is about OUR families....of which there is just Aria and I. Although everyone was sweet and kind, they were not MY family....which is HMG (who is visiting his mom in Georgia) and my friends. For the first time in a long time...I wished I was married, cause I think mother's day is a celebration of couples as well and the incredible commitment they have made to having a child. While HMG is not my "husband" he is special to me....however, I found myself wishing that he was....then we would have the banner of "family" and I would not have been left alone to celebrate Mother's Day "alone". Why do I say this....I had to listen to so many ignorant statements by my sister's in laws and ....my sister and I are having a falling out at the moment over the issues with my mother. She thought I took bad care of her and was the reason her dog died (long story...but my sister left for two weeks on her honeymoon and had my mom watch her dogs and her 16 year old dog was on death's door when she returned, but why would you leave an ailing dog with an ailing mom????) and mom the fact the mom is worse is MY FAULT....I took some of the blame....but told her that it was selfish to stick mom with a single mother who is trying to work, raise a child and tend a home ALONE!....when she was a couple with no children. She failed to see the logic and belittled me to tears and I finally picked Aria up and left breakfast a few week ago when she wanted to "discuss things" we still have not recovered from that conversation. So I had to endure her in laws telling me that Aria was a "practice child" for TT and her husband and how lucky they were to be able to "practice on her. Oh and that she looked "healthy" and wondered how a "crack baby" was able to ever really be healthy. Aria was so fabulous....really. She hugged everyone and loves to do "cheers" with her sippy cup so she "cheered" everyone's mimosas with her soy milk....getting much attention as usual. My sister actually finally told me to take her home before "I steal her." and also told me...."Aria is so amazing I have nothing to criticize you for, you actually are a very good mother!" That was it, I drove home in tears!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And wished I had a family of my own....I guess I wished I had a "real" family. I got a photo album of my sister's wedding as a gift and one framed picture of Aria (which was nice) the photo album was of my sister and her husband. I spend hundreds of dollars on their gifts....but anyway it was what they wanted to give me and it was really nice. But if I had had a husband we would have shared our joy of motherhood and raising Aria together.....and I missed that. Insead we were the consolation prize at the circus....and it left me feeling really sad. But I have a beautiful daughter who I adore and I guess Mother's day is really about us anyway :-) And I don't need any gift...just her.