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Grecco0810 replied on Natasha Swinson's thread "When reunions don’t work".
Oh I think it is so important to tell him how you feel. Don't string him along. Just tell him that you think of him as a friend but not really a family member and that you're sorry but that's just the way it is because you weren't raised with him. If he's emotionally healthy, he will back off. If he doesn't, then you'll have to be firm and draw boundaries with him. I was so so excited to meet my birth family and my mother was not as excited. Everyone's different. I just thought of this is so great more family members! Yay! LOL. We all process differently, but definitely tell him. My bio mom didn't tell me but she told everyone else that she had no maternal feelings for me and that was really very rude of her. Had she told me, I would have backed off immediately. Give him that opportunity
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Grecco0810 replied on MC Ha's thread "Why do adoptees look for their birth mother?".
It is hard to explain. The only way I can explain it is suppose you found out after you give birth to a child and raised him that he was accidentally Switched at Birth. Would you want to get to know him? Or would you leave it alone because he was a stranger? It's the exact same for us. It's kind of like there's this family somewhere that we actually came from and we've never met them. Why would anyone want to get to know their child who was switched at birth? You don't know them theyre a stranger you already have another child that you raised in love. Why would you want to get to know them? Same situation