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I understand what you mean. My husband doesn't quite understand either. He can't seem to get past what the bparents did and see why they did it and that their actions don't necessarily say they don't love their children. Infact, I have met very few people who understand my feelings. I get so tired of people's neg. feelings and attitudes about bparents. I use to have people make comments to me all the time. Many have learned, though, that I don't share or appreciate their views. I feel the bparents (especially the bmoms) and I will be forever connected through my children I think about and pray for them often. Many times when I'm enjoying my children and they do something cute or funny, I think about their bmoms and what they are missing. Happy for me but still sad for them. So many mixed emotions with adoption.