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I was honored to be a part of my bdaughters wedding last month. Lori and I were reunited 5 years ago and have a great relationship. The adoption was closed and the years of not knowing if she was healthy, happy, etc-all of us bmom's know the feelings-were so difficult. The idea of even being able to be at her wedding was only a dream in my mind. It was almost unbearable to think how I would react seeing her in her wedding gown. There were tears-many of them. But tears are good and are very healing. I can't put into words the emotions I felt inside just watching her that day. She is so happy now with her new husband. We have a bond that is hard to describe. It's almost like when we talk we know what each other is thinking. Placing Lori for adoption was the most difficult and painful decision I had to make in my life. But to this day I would never change my decision. Seeing how loved she is by her aparents and the good life she has had makes me more secure in my decision. I know deep down inside at 17 I could not have made the life for her I wanted her to have. She needed to be with parents that were ready to parent.
I also want to share a dream Lori had the night she and I met. I know there needs to be closure when something tramatic happens in our lives and until I met Lori I didn't have that. She now has it and also believes her birthfather does too. Here is her dream.
Lori dreamt that she and I were up in heaven sitting on clouds and the sky was a brilliant deep blue with stars all around us. She said she saw us sitting there singing lullaby songs, very softly. She said she looked over and there on a cloud was Tony (Her birthfather) sitting up in a white and brass bed wearing pajamas. He looked at her with a very peaceful look on his face and slowly layed down and pulled the covers up over him and went to sleep. She told me we were singing him to sleep.
(Tony was killed in a car accident when Lori was about 3-she thought this dream meant that she is back now and he can now go to sleep-everything is okay now)
Peace-
Teresa
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Hi Teresa! I posted to say that your story really warmed my heart. I am also a reunited B-mom, my daughter Tamara is 22 and we met last year. Our story is simular to yours in many ways one being that my daughters father was also killed, he died in a car accident months before she was born.
The other thing I wanted to share is that when my daughter and I met she said that she often dreamed that a tall muscular man would meet her in a deserted place as she stood alone and lost and take her hand and without saying a word he'd take her to a nice lady who would weep with joy over her being found. Then the man would walk away and turn and wave having never spoken but he'd be surrounded by a light that was too bright to let her see his face, only his profile. She says the lady wasn't her A-mom and the dream never frightened her as a child. As she became older it confused her since she didn't know anyone in the dream except herself.
Weeks after we reunited she had the dream once again but this time she saw that I was the lady and the man called my name and told me he loved me. She said it ended with him leaving this time by driving away in a blue car. He was killed in a blue car but I never (still haven't) told her that.
Its weird but I somehow think shes had dreams of her dad for years. Just wanted to share; best wishes in your reunion. Tara
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