I can't bond/attach to my adopted child

You might try googling Nancy Thomas and attachment as she is a highly respected expert on attachment/rad/bonding. She has a website that might have some useful information for you. Crick

I just read in today's Sunday news that 14.3 percent of adopted children with special needs experience dissolution. You are troubled about bonding and seeking support and advice - I think that shows you do have a bond! Concern for your relationship - bond, right? I hope you find it from all the successful parents who adopted older children on this site.

I'd like some info, too. Our 10 year old daughter has lived with us for a year now, and I still don't feel bonded with her. She has RAD. I tell her I love her all the time, but I don't really feel it.

I'd like to invite you to the Attachment Disorder Network [url="http://www.radzebra.org/why.htm"]http://www.radzebra.org/why.htm[/url] and its special listserv, Little Zebras. Go to [url="http://www.radzebra.org/supportinfo.htm"]http://www.radzebra.org/supportinfo.htm[/url], read a little about Little Zebras, and then, since it's invitation only, just click on Contact Us in the upper right corner and send a message. You'll be amazed at the community feeling and the resources. Little Zebras is pretty much recognized across the country by the RAD experts as being the finest mailing list (different from a forum such as this) for RAD parents. We'd love to have you.Juli BriggsHuntsville, AL

Children with RAD are difficult to parent and often trigger your own family-of-origin issues. Anyone with a child with trauma-attachment disorders should be working with a therapist who is experienced in attachment-based treatment (see [url="http://www.attach.org"]http://www.attach.org[/url] for a listing of therapists how are properly trained and competant). A big part of the work is helping the parent with the issues these children trigger within you. A good book you may find helpful along the way is Parenting From the Inside Out by Daniel Siegel. regards