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We were once planning something similar--weren't able to go through with it...but here are some of the ideas we tossed around:
to start the party, a small event with family pastor saying a prayer over the joining of this family....daughter gets beautiful, frilly dress for the occasion. With this age, possibly even Family pendant presented after prayer....they have Family coins now that would be appropriate for sons.
Lots and lots of balloons. Oriental Trading has wonderful decorating stuff....must be very, very festive. AS previous poster suggested, those blow up bouncy things are fabulous for kid parties.
Also, Walmart has packs of Fun Dough that are 97 cents for four---and they make great party favors...as well as great entertainment for kids this age. Have a table with some Fun Dough and cookie cutters out---that was the most popular station at my daughter's recent b-day party--and she's 1!! Also, these individual containers make great ornmanets to tie balloons to on the table...and are colorful and festive. Final note here: recently found on the internet where you can make personalized wrappers for playdough containers with your child's picture. Look for candy wrapper templates...on your search engine...great idea with your children's pics on them....
Easy decorations without buying: go to local library or school and use their die-cut machine to cut out different shapes of animals. Have these line the middle of the table, cookie animals or Rice Krispie treat animals, pb& j sandwiches in animal shapes....
In announcement for party: if you would like no gifts, suggest bringing your favorite children's book to share with the children and build their own personal library.
Hope this isn't too corny...just thought I'd let you know some ideas.