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I'm in the same boat Mommy4carson! We knew we always wanted to adopt and thought that maybe we'd try to conceive and then adopt. But, as we got to talking we just decided to try adoption first. I think we will try to concieve next and if it doesn't work we'll just adopt again. People have been really surprised by that when we tell them, but everyone has been supportive and think it's wonderful, especially when they see the photo of our little boy to be! I often tell people that there are many ways to build a family, and we chose to start our family through adoption. They are usually like, 'yeah, that's true, I never thought about it that way before'. I too am glad to see others who have chosen to adopt without any medical problems - I don't feel so wierd anymore!
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As a child people would ask me what I wanted to do when I grew up and my answer was to be a wife and a mom. When we found out that it was going to be hard to have bio children, our first thought was adoption. We never looked in any other direction. I knew from the second that we found out that we both had a minor problem that god had put us together for a reason. The reason was that we were going to adopt our children and have a wonderful life. I am very blessed:wings:
My husband and I had three bio boys when I felt the call to adopt. We feel so blessed by everything that God has given us and we wanted to share that. My husband was drawn to Guatemala right away because he had been there and seen the extreme poverty first hand. He always wanted to make a difference, but never thought that he could. When we started the process and I felt so confused by where to look for our son and my husband said right away that he knew our son in Guatemala! I have to admit that this whole process has just been amazing and I feel truly blessed to have each one of my boys. I wish that everyone would open their hearts and their homes to all those children who just need someone to love them. Thank you for each of your stories!
I've always wanted to adopt. I had three cousins that were adopted, and then in the fifth grade I saw a little girl at school that had been adopted and I knew it then...that I would adopt one day. I also read the book "The Family Nobody Wanted", probably when I was in sixth grade. I read it over and over. I own two copies of it now!!! It's just always been in my heart to adopt and we are now able too!!! We have six bio kids and this little one is going to be so loved I can't wait for him to come home! Great thread!
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There were several factors for us. When I was a teen I had told everyone that I was going to adopt someday. Then I married later on, and 7 years later I still hadn't had children. We signed up for adopting through the state while still trying naturally, and another 5 years went by and still no children. During these 12 years, my brother had 7 kids (3 homemade, 4 through adoption - 3 from Russia and 1 from Guatemala). Last year, our 12th year of marriage, Dave and I both looked at each other and said no more waiting. We signed up, and we're about to have a baby boy. Our 13th year of marriage is April 24th, and I hope to have Caleb home by then.
I was in church and the sermon was what ever is ailing you, work, money, family what ever it is let it go, it's in God's hands. That moment I took a deep breath and thought, okay maybe I am not meant to be a mommy and here to be a step mom. :( When I told my husband that having a child together is over and I am letting go and moving on. He said no it's not over..........let's adopt. I thought he would be high fiving me with the decision. Since he has been there done that. routine. He is 48 and I am 38 (I think) Instead I was in complete shock, we never discussed or knew anyone close to us that adopted. We didn't know anything about adopting at all. What he knew was how important being a mom was to me. Well that Monday I was all over the internet researching and here we are! :clap: I think I was always meant to adopt, I just didn't know it.
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I wanted to adopt for several reasons:1. Last pregnancy was life threatening. I do not want to risk my life and the life of an unborn child. 2. I have two wonderful bio boys, but have always wanted a girl as well. My mom and I have a very close relationship and I hope to share that with a daughter. 3. Adoption is in our family: My grandmother was adopted. My grandfather spent his entire youth in an orphanage. My cousin was adopted from Korea. 4. I've been to Guatemala and would love to adopt from the country. In the future, our daughter will be able to learn Spanish in school. Guatemala is close enough to visit on a regular basis. 5. God put an urge in me to adopt that would not go away!!! I KNEW that our family was not complete. I've been researching for almost two years and finally, we are ready to welcome a baby daughter!
I am also of the "probably am able to have bio kids, but wanted to have a family via adoption" camp. I just wanted to let all of you know, who have the same basic reason for adopting, that there is a yahoo group out there called "FirstAdopt." The description is: This is a place for singles and couples, who believe themselves to be fertile, who decided to create a family through adoption without attempting to create one through biology. The vast majority of our members have consistently taken measures (often permanent ones) to protect against pregnancy and have made the decision that their families will only be created through adoption. Membership in this group is limited to those who chose to Only Adopt their children and have no biological children. I've been a member for almost 3 years, and it's an awesome group! The link is: [url]http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firstadopt/[/url] One of my cutie pie sons is on the homepage now :-)
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I was adopted as an infant, and adoption just always seemed "normal" to me. I was definitely raised on the idea that there if one of your needs is to be a mommy, well somewhere in the world there is a kid who needs a family, so why not meet each other...I was also moved by stories of families who adopted "unwanted" children. And, as a child of the 60s and early 70s, the whole overcrowded-world thing had a big influence. Ironically, now that I am the mother of 6 children, I find that when I tell people I have 6 kids and I get this "really, 6 kids?" look, I feel this urge to point out that we have adopted, in order to somehow "defend" myself against the idea that I am contributing to the world's overpopulation. Isn't that nutso?? Like it's anybody's business....!!!
I'm blessed with a bio daughter, age 8, had her later -- I was 36 when she was born. We planned to have another -- when we weren't so exhausted and in the midst of various family responsibilities, crises, etc., and time passed! I lost a pregnancy at 40, and at that point, doctor said hormones and such were very out of whack, and I'd need to do hormone treatments, etc. I'd had a rough pregnancy first time around, and couldn't handle another m/c. We'd always said that we would be parents, whether by biology or adoption. And then one night I had a dream about a beautiful little baby boy that my recently departed mother was showing me, and from that point on, the universe just put every step in front of me, and I just followed along, all theh way headed in the direction of finding my Bebito Danny.Mary