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Thread: Stealing food
Stealing food, hoarding food, hiding food and/or other life essentials is part of the territory for foster kids. They have legitimate reasons for doing it--including lack of trust that basic needs will be taken care of by the adults around them, that the adults themselves won't withhold or hog what they need, the psych. need to feel self-sufficient, etc.
The first month, our FD often stashed her stuffed animals, books, favorite toys, etc., under her bed. Then she seemed to get over it. Six months later, cleaning up her room, I found a box mix for cake and a can of frosting under her bed along with some special possessions again. It just takes time to build trust. She is only six and will come around quicker than your 14 y.o., who may never fully trust enough to shed these habits.
There are different ways to handle it, but punishment or reprimand isn't, IMO, one of them. Where he is 14, has been in a group home, etc. and is probably at least your size, I'd avoid direct, angry confrontations. If it were me, I'd make something else for lunch and calmly tell him (A) I know you took the food, it's OK, (B) you don't have to worry about getting enough here, (C) if you didn't eat it right away, what you took will probably spoil/go stale and make you sick or attract little unwanted pets to your room, etc. (humorously) so you might not want to do that again.
Then you can say, I was going to use that ham/chicken/whatever and now I don't have it. Establish a snack cupboard with some at least semi-healthy munchies and snack bowl for veggies/fruits in the fridge and let him know he can take from those whenever he wants.
If you need a consequence down the line, it could be that he must replace what he takes.
Good luck and blessings.