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We faced the same situation when we were looking into adopting from foster care... We heard lots of negatives, that we were going to wait too long for a newborn, etc, etc... We went along with our plan to only do fost/adopt, take only children that are likely, to be adopted. I say likely, because you always have the risk of them going back to their families. Well after a month and a half of our homestudy being approved we were matched to a beautiful, healthy, two days old baby girl. She has been with us since, TPR was granted last month, and we'll be signing adoption placement next month. So, there are succesful stories out there, you just don't hear them often. Why? Because people needs to be educated a little more that not because a child comes from foster care, he/she will have behavior, develpmental problems. Even if you have your own kids, you never know for sure if everything will be perfect. If you heart is set to do fost/adopt, follow your heart, just like we did, and at the end, if it's meant to be for you, you'll have your infant. I won't say that the path will be all easy, but is all worth it.
Isa