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My husband and I adopted 3 children 12 years ago. After he saw the baby for the first time he looked at me and said " The baby is mine". She was four months old, precious, and sweet. Who would have thought this baby girl would be the reason our family would be in court for the second time in our life time facing charges of theft. The last several months have been challenging to say the least.
This daughter is the youngest of the three. Our oldest was our first challenge. His 3 1/2 year old heart was broken when we joined us. We've spent the last several years trying to help him break strong holds and mold him into a young man. In the processes we struggled with lying, stealing, sneaking... Everything got so bad I wasn't sure I'd make it. I went through depression I looked for military schools summer long camps. We couldn't afford them. I didn't like him. He challenged my faith in ways I can't describe. I questioned why we had made a decision to have kids. What was God thinking handing these kids to me. What would my life have looked like if we' d stayed the favorite aunt and uncle. Our son turns 16 this Sunday. His English teacher asked me if I'd read his latest English paper assignment. I replied "no". She said you need to. I'm sobbing through 2 1/2 pages of his written memoir sharing his adoption story. Sharing our discipline and what he learned through it. Understanding why we did what we need to train him up and breaking him at times. He spoke of how we support him and his dreams how we have loved him when it was hard. The last line of his paper said this. "The support my parents have given me has provided me the confidence that I need to look at adulthood with assurance that I can succeed in life."
I told his teacher if the boy didn't get an A on this paper she and I were going to fight. Lol finally some air....
Back to our youngest. 5 times worse..... I've homeschooled (we're in a homeschool coop, hence the teacher comments above) my kids for the last 3 years. I find myself wondering again, what is. God thinking... We're in counseling, she's stealing from friends, family, stores... She lies as easily as she breathes. She's been engaging in inappropriate conversations with strangers on the internet, ondevices she has stollen and used in the night. We're careful, we have locks and codes, internet is timed and supervised. We have put locks on three of the four bedrooms, she has no door on hers as she has lost that privilege. My heart is broken. We have a court date scheduled to see a juvinile judge for theft charges. I'm scared she will follow the life of the birth mother. Drug addict, abuser, broken. We love her. She's going to public school next year. I need respite. I'm tired and worn out. What was He thinking giving me kids.....
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Keepingitreal,
Simply select the text in your post, right click to copy, go to the special needs subforum in the adoptive parent forum - paste your post. Add the title and then X-Post at the end.
There is also the Foster Care Adoption forum.
Kind regards,
Dickons
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Yes cross post for sure! Sooo sorry this is your reality. Trust me I understand. Sending lots of hugs your way!