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just my two cents... we have 5 children also. 4 that are birthed to our family and one who we adopted. We were heading down the path of Foster/adopt... took the classes, started the homestudy etc..... when the rev. at our church called and said an unwed couple came to his office wondering if he knew of anyone in the church looking to adopt. they were pregnant and due that coming July. ANywy, we ended up pursuing that and baby "S" came home with us from the hospital... We are currently in the proces of taking on a 12 year old boy. Basically, you gotta roll with the punches. another thing to remember is that if you decide to wait for a domestic adoption and looking for a birthmom to choose you, you have no guarantee of a 100% healthy child. even your birth children are not guaranteed that. SInce your dh is a pastor, he should know that whatever his plan is for this is not the plan that has been chosen for him already....