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My story began over 20 years ago. I was only 19. I was young, divorced and a single mom. I thought I could have some fun and catch up on what I had been missing out on. Again, I was 19. I met this man who was 30. He seemed nice, just hanging out, riding the dirt roads and passing time. I noticed he became very persuasive about wanting to have sex. He actually made me feel guilty. Well the influencing me became worse and worse. I knew I did not want to head down this road. I ended the relationship. Later I had learned he had recently been in prison on drug charges. Whew I was lucky to get out of that one.... Or so I thought. A month later I discovered I was pregnant. I was scared to death. What was I going to do with an already 2 year old, no job, living with my grandparents and now this? I started seeing a boy, that I truly cared about. I am sad to admit I tried to pass the pregnancy off as his. Of course it later became apparent that I was lying. I felt horrible. Even though we broke up, he supported me throughout the rest of the pregnancy (he was even there . I decided adoption was the best way for the baby and for me and my situation. My family were wonderful. They made it up to me. I knew that if I chose to keep her, that they would help me, but I this was something that I had to decide. I chose an out of state agency, because I didn't want to question every baby I saw. They were wonderful. They sent me profiles on on the parents and tbh I chose the nerdiest parents in the group. Just because they looked so sincere. It didn't look like they "had" to have a baby, it looked like they "wanted" to have a baby. She was born and I only saw her once as I passed by the nursery when I was discharged. The parents were great. I got the opportunity to meet them when we signed all the papers. I knew that I had made the right decision. They always sent letters and pictures around her birthday.
During the next 18 years I remarried to the most awesome man EVER (15 years). My son is 22 and I also have a 22 year old stepdaughter and together we have a 13 year old son.
I never hid the adoption from anyone. I always have her picture on my desk with all of my kids.
Occassionally I would send gifts via the agency. For her 18th Birthday, I sent her a locket with her baby picture and my baby picture with the words "The best day 2/10/1994" engraved on the back. Three days after her birthday - I got a text. "Is this Shawna" - it was an out of state number. I texted back "yes, who might this be?" a few minutes later "this is your birthdaughter". I was stunned. I think we texted for the next 5 hours. We have moved very slow. We have friended each other on facebook and texted and even skyped. I sent her some gifts. It has been wonderful. I really think that neither of us has felt any pressure through this whole process.
Now my stepdaughter and son are both getting married. My son is getting marrried in August to his girlfriend of 4 years and my stepdaughter is getting married a year from February. Well my birthdaughter is friends with all of her biological siblings on facebook. My sons girlfriend asked her for her address to send her an invitation to the wedding and she was thrilled. So I got a message asking if she came to the wedding could she stay with me. I was like "absolultely!" She wanted to drive from Colorado to Alabama. I wanted to be able to afford to help her, but with 2 weddings on the horizon, it is looking pretty bleak. So I asked her if she would be offended if I started a gofundme page to be able to buy plane tickets. She was thrilled at the idea. Not only would it avoid her having to drive all this way, but it would give her more time to be here before having to return because of school. So I did. [url=http://www.gofundme.com/ReunitingFamily]Help me reunite with my birth daughter by Shawna Chapman Ragland - GoFundMe[/url] I am not asking for you to donate, but if you could share on your twitter or FB that would be great. As soon as I have enough for 2 tickets, I will end the campaign. I know you each know how I feel.
I hope that your stories are as happy as mine.
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