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I'm in an odd sit. We want to adopt and got licensed w/ state and county. 6 months ago, friend of family came around and needed work. We provided him some work. In conversations, we talked about our adoption plans. As it turned out, he had an infant that we did not know about in foster care. The mom's rights were TPR for drugs (2nd kid lost). But he isn't a hard core druggy. They aren't together anymore, and he has been going to parenting classes, etc. to try to get her back. However, he claims that he would just assume see a loving couple like my husband and me have the child since he is old. He knows we are loving and can provide more. He doesn't want to see this child go to an unknown foster home.
We tried calling the county numerous times about getting her -- no calls back. We finally got an abrupt answer that she was in an adoptive home. We figured dad lost rights, so we quit calling. Then, we talked to him months later. He was horrified that they told us this. His rights haven't been TPR'd, but he said he has a scheduled TPR hearing. He claims he has been going to classes, etc. He claims he has done all the requirements, but had a bad SW. He got a new SW and gave us her #. We called. SW said she is recommending TPR, but judge could award kid to dad if attny presents a case that he's done everything. We asked if rights are TPR's if we can get her. She said since we aren't blood family, we won't be considered if rights are TPR'd.
However, doesn't the dad have some say who can raise his kid if he can't? I asked the SW that, and she said a judge would have to decide, but they usually favor the current foster parents over friends of family. This is a shame b/c we are good licensed people and could keep the kid in touch with its aunt & cousins. Plus, we know dad and would be open to visits. Dad isn't a bad person; he is just old and doesn't have stable employment. He ultimately wants her back, and if he can't have that, he wants us to raise her, not the foster parents. What should we do? The hearing is in three weeks.
I don't see why he can't get get an attny and relinquish rights to us. Anyone know about this?
On a side note, if we do get her, I know the current foster parents will be so sad. However, we tried to get her sooner.
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Unfortunately it's not up to Dad as to whom gets to adopt the little one. It's normally the Judge who decides after consulting with what CPS and the GAL feels is a good placement. In our case they had a CRPT meeting to determine where placement would go and they decided to move our niece to our home. But that even dragged out because the previous FP's decided to fight the placement to our home. You have to understand the child may be bonded where she is and that may be the deciding factor. Since we were family and we are licensed foster parents that was in our favor. Plus having the Mom supporting the placement with us that definitely helped move her here. But even then the process was long and we ended up having to hire an attorney to help us. It's a good thing you can keep the child involved with her current bio family however how do you know that the current foster parents aren't able to do that also? How long has the child been in their home? You can plead your case to CPS but in the end the Judge determines where the child will stay. At least in our case we had the CASA worker and CPS eventually on our side for placement but it took getting an attorney and alot of work (constantly calling CPS and the CASA) and money. I'm not sure how they feel since you are not bio family and have no prior relationship with the child. That also may not help.
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