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so, yesterday the previous foster mother came to my childrens after school progam and professed her love of MY children. She told them how much she missed them and asked if they would keep a secret...then she said she was appealing the adoption because she wants them back. She went on and on about how their dogs miss them and about how much her and her husband love them and want them back. Luckily, my daughter said she wasn't comfortable keeping that secret from me and told me. My kids said they were upset and didn't know what to feel seeing her. Obviously it was very confusing to them. That woman and her husband fostered the kids for almost 2 years flip-flopping over whether or not to adopt them. They even brought the kids to social services 3 times in 1 year with the intention of turning over for a different family. But when it came down to having the social worker show up and remove the kids, they always changed their mind. Then they decided to adopt, but they only wanted my daughter because she is the "good one" they said. My son has a learning disability and was about to get kicked out of the 1st grade for violent behavior and they just "couldn't handle it". I am so frustrated that this woman is essentially stalking my children and I feel helpless to stop it.
So, after talking to my social worker, I've decided my first course of action will be to write a complaint letter to the afternoon program. I will state that I am requesting this individual to not be around my children as her presence is detrimental to their new home and is undermining the postive family environment they are in now. It is putting pressure on my children's loyality and attachments. If this issue is not resolved, I will be seeking a restraining order. At least that's somewhat of how I hope it will go. I'm trying to take the higher road here. I will be cc:ing it to the judge and social workers' office in hopes it may do some good. It is very frustrating going through the whole adoption licensing, approval, etc. and to see the beautiful light at the end of the tunnel, only to have a very selfish couple try to cloud it up. They had two years with the kids and didn't adopt, and only now, after they have been adopted by my husband and I do they decide they want them. It is crazy. Really crazy. This woman is a school counselor for petes sake and here she is stalking my kids. Her husband was already banned from their school because he couldn't stay away from them. My God, who do they think they are? And what Judge in their right mind would think that their home is a better environment they mine? We are not perfect people, but the best interest of our children comes first, NOT our selfishness.
I was told to keep a journal of everything if this whole appeal thing goes to court. That's the purpose of this. Yesterday, I filed a restraining order against the former foster family. They should be served today. I feel like I'm stuck in a Lifetime movie. It sucks. These people are totally insane. I found out that they made my kids talk to their "dad" (the former foster father). Their "dad" told them they are painting "their" bedrooms for when they come "home". That's psycho talk. I've had entirely enough. I am their adoptive mother and my protective instincts have arrived.
I am in need of some advice. I have a journal here that's public for more info. Thanks.