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my new baby is 2 months old today... she is such a snuggle bug.... i always put her to bed at night in her cradle (Which was actually my oldest daughters cradle 18 years ago!!)... but when she wakes up for her next meal.. somewhere around 4:00 or 5:00 a.m... i scoop her up and cuddle her into bed with me... this is mostly pure laziness... i am so warm and comfy in my bed, that i just can't quite bring myself to walk over the rocking chair, feed the baby for 30 minutes and put her back in her cradle... it started with my first born, whom i nursed... so, i just had to scoop her out of the cradle and nurse her... and we both just went back to sleep in my bed.... anyhow.. the habit continued with the next two... and now with my fourth baby... i just keep the bottles by my bed, along with the bottle warmer (she loves warm milk!)... and we hardly wake up for that meal... well, at two months... she already recognizes me and expresses a preference for me... if she is crying, she quiets when she hears my voice.. and knows i am coming... she is smiling at me... and cooing... and when i snuggle her into my bed... all wrapped in her blankey, and under my covers... she snuggles down into this place in between my arm and chest, with her head on my arm... and she LOVES it there... she burrows in and hardly eats her meal... i doubt she even needs it, but is in the habit of bunking in with me... and she drifts back to the most peaceful sleep... then, when we wake up in the morning... she is bright eyed and ready to go... but before we get up, i cuddle her into the crook of my elbow... she looks right into my eyes... and drinks in my face... she is super intense... and she stares... steadily.... memorizing every wrinkle... as we were going through this exercise one morning... it struck me like a lightening bolt... she doesn't know... she doesn't know she didn't come from inside of me.... and i know she doesn't know that..... because she is behaving exactly like my first three babies who did.... no difference.... and i was a little sad... because i know someday she will understand that she didn't come from inside of me... and that will bring a set of challenges into her life... that i would rather she not have to face.... but for now... she doesn't know.... the only thing she knows, is that i am her mommy.... and that i take care of her.... julie
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That was just soooo beautiful. Seriously, I am sitting here in tears... My son was bio and my daughter was adopted; and sometimes I forget that I didn't give birth to her. Isn't it amazing and beautiful how you can love them the same regardless? And that right now, they are so innocent to everything. Thank you for letting me read that. You captured my thoughts exactly.
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The best thing about babies is, none of them know. Even the ones mothers carry inside for nine months. The only thing that matters to the little bubs is that they have your eyes to gaze intensly into, and your arm to cuddle in. babies are so accepting. We all need to take a page out of their books.
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