Same sex couples + adoption

A distant friend adopted a baby girl from Vietnam and he is gay. She has both of her dads last name and Vietnam was fine with this. Vietnam is currently a closed program but may open up, you never know. They adopted her about 8 years ago so I am not sure if things have changed. In my own research of adoption I did see that there was one other country that was open to gays to adopt but I cant remember what it was. Good luck. If you watch the show Adoption Stories, there are some episodes of gays adopting but it was all domestic. Good luck

And for the OP, there are ways to look for adoption agencies that are more open-minded (PM me for an idea or two). And you might want to consider hiring/consulting with an adoption attorney if you haven't already.

I hate to admit it nursie but Vietnam no longer allows openly LGBT people to adopt. It says so on the US Department of State's website here:Civil Status of Prospective Adoptive Parents: Vietnam law permits adoption by married couples (one man, one woman) and single heterosexual persons. Vietnam law prohibits homosexual individuals or couples from adopting Vietnamese children.

My friends, this whole thread is depressing me. It is just not fair that GLBT couples should face such obstacles to growing their family. However, I do have a bit of hope to offer: :thankyou: You are all welcome here in Massachusetts:thankyou: Come to Massachusetts. You can get married. You can enjoy all of the (state) protections of marriage. You can adopt your babies as a married couple. (I know that our local DCF office is very welcoming to GLBT couples and if you are willing to take a risk, you can adopt a baby - I'm working on my second adoption through DCF). The best benefit of all - you can raise you children in a state that recognizes you as a family - equal to all other families. There - that's my rant for the day. Good luck.

Originally Posted by sak9645 No country in the world, including the U.S., will let two cohabiting singles, whether gay or straight, adopt as a couple.

This is not true as I know two gay couples that have recently adopted domestically and they live together as an openly gay couple and both included it on their dossier. Both adopted in different states. I would research agencies carefully

Luv2teach2 I did not say that gay couples can't adopt. I said that they, as well as straight but unmarried couples, can't adopt internationally AS COUPLES, even when they live together openly. In other words, if Jack and Jill OR Jack and Bill want to adopt from a foreign country, ONE partner must complete the adoption as a single person. If Jack is that person, his homestudy will indicate that he lives with a partner, unless he chooses to try to hide the relationship. Jack's partner will be interviewed and will have to go through a criminal background and child abuse check, since he/she lives in the same residence. If the partner's finances are needed to qualify the couple for adoption, or if the couple's finances are completely intertwined, then the finances of both will be considered. The adoption decree will be written in Jack's name, and Jack will be the one who must have an approved I-600A and I-600. Now, in some states, including the District of Columbia, there is a law -- often referred to as a "second parent adoption" law. If Jack lives in one of those jurisdictions, he can petition the court, after the adoption, to have his partner, Jill or Bill, granted the full rights of a parent. Unfortunately, many states do not have second parent laws. Now that Massachusetts has legalized gay marriage, things may have to change. But even married gay and lesbian residents of Massachusetts will most likely continue to have to adopt as singles for the foreseeable future, if they choose international adoption. It is unclear to me whether the USCIS will be allowed to approve an I-600A or I-600 from a married, same-sex couple. And foreign countries will definitely not issue adoption decrees in the name of two people of the same gender. Plenty of gay and lesbian people adopt, and plenty of gay and lesbian people with partners adopt. But until the Massachusetts experience leads to significant changes in laws around the country, and until foreign countries are more comfortable with gay and lesbian parents, do not expect to see the names of two people of the same gender on a foreign adoption decree or on a child's visa. Sharon

I hate to admit it but foreigner are not allowed to adopt from the USA. Long and short, the US has implemented the Hague Treaty and Hague forbids the private placement of children abroad (this is also why Guatemala is now closed because babies were placed privately - therefore breaking the Hague rules.). Unfortunately, this is how many Americans adopt newborn babies so getting a infant is close to impossible. Infants must be on a "data bank" for two months before they are allowed to go abroad and to be quite frank rarely will a healthy infant of any race wait that long for a family. Infants who are still available after 2 months often have Fetal Alcohol Syndrome or severe special needs. However, foreigners are allowed to adopt from our foster care system but most of the children are ages 8 and up - unless they have younger siblings. There is a very long wait time (5-8 years) for infants UNLESS you foster before you adopt and never will they allow foreigners to foster because they want the children close to their biological parents while she/he still have custody. I would suggest you look into agencies located in Ireland that work in developing/third world countries.

People from other countries can adopt from US foster care. However, most of the children are older and/or special needs.

Just to correct in case anyone reads this for future reference - the Hague does not forbid placements of children abroad. The Hague just says you have to look domestically first. And unfortunately, in certain areas children of a certain race will wait longer than two months for homes and so will most likely become available for foreign adoptions. Most countries that conduct international adoptions are Hague countries. Adoptions from Guatamala have halted as both countries attempt to ratify the Hague - neither were Hague countries before and so the process is in the air as both put the regulations into place. East for a devloped country as they have the infrastructure, more problems for Guat as it doen't have the same structures. The Hague is a good thing for the protection of children - it assures their rights and lessens the chances of child-trafficking. Right now adoptions from the US to other countries have halted until the Hague process has been clearly in place, but will most likely start up again.

Yes, but I think the OP said she wanted an infant. Its very difficult to adopt infants from foster care unless you foster a child first or the child has severe special needs. If the state government rarely allows its own citizens living in a different state to participate in the foster/adopt program I serious doubt they will allow foreigners to. Most agencies will also tell you its very hard to get a child under the age of 7 or 8 years old if you live in a different state/country UNLESS that child has younger siblings and maybe if they are member of a minority group or have moderate special needs Your right Karyn, it just that when private adoption takes place do the tables start to turn. One of the reason Guatemala is in limbo is because they were placing infants privately which is not allowed under Hague Convention rules. In the USA many states allow adoptive parents to use facilatators to find infants and we all know that using a facilatator in international adoption is generally not recommended. I have met a few Canadians online who were trying to adopt from here but the Hague Convention came into place and were not grandfathered in the system therefore losing their matches or applications. I don't want this to happen to the OP so it would be best to consider foster care adoption or a different country.

I was reading about international adoptions in Alberta, Canada Karyn and its states this: If you want to adopt a child from another country, you have two distinct options: you may adopt a child through the government of the other country or you may adopt a child privately. If the country you want to adopt a child from has adopted the Hague Convention on Intercountry Adoptions, only government adoptions are possible. Citizenship and Immigration Canada (CIC) is responsible for the immigration process that allows the child you have adopted or intend to adopt to come to Canada. Hague Convention information is also available on the Government of Canada website.

Yes, it all has to be done in Canada through the Ministry of Children's services which is federal - but that doesn't mean you have to adopt from a government agency abroad. Our two boys are from private baby homes in South Africa. But then their adoption were done through the courts of South Africa - so through the government. But that doesn't mean the only option is to adopt out of foster care or government homes. Both Canada AND South Africa are Hague compliant. In fact, there is an agency in BC that is beginning to re-look at US-Canada adoptions and hope to be restarting their program soon... Is that what you were trying to say or did I miss your point?

I wasn't trying to say that international adoption from the USA is impossible - its just going to be very hard and more expensive. The OP should not put herself through unnessesary drama and a very long wait time if things do go the way these "adoption experts" believe they will. Less than 1% of the infants available go abroad and nowadays there may be even fewer. In nearly every countries that has implmented Hague have VERY long waits for healthy infants. Look at China, Phillipines, Columbia and Poland. The wait for healthy infants and toddlers is over 3 years! Imagine the OP coming to America and waiting 3 years to by matched with a baby that may have special needs that she isn't open too. Therefore, that is why I was suggesting that she look at a different country because USA is unstable and unpredictable. You can read a Canadian article here ([url=http://www.familyhelper.net/news/unitedstates.html]United States - Adoption News (Family Helper,)[/url]) ; basically these speculations are only educated guesses and if you've noticed most agencies are not accepting applications for their US program and many placing agencies here are not accepting applications from foreigners. These are all classic red flags that adoptions are unstable and may not even continue...but only time will tell that.

Yup, it is a bit unknown right now for sure. But, it is starting again. And, we waited for 5 months for the placement of a healthy infant - and that is close to the average for South Africa. And again, SA is a Hague country, as is Canada. I also don't want anyone waiting unnecessarily - but also don't want anyone reading this with facts that aren't quite right. The babies from SA are between 2-10 months, and average wait is 6 months to a year. SA is not open to US citizens at this time though. Ghana and Zambia have also opened up - Zambia places young infants but the wait time varies - but is not 3 years. Actually, Ethiopia is similar - wait times are now at around 8 months for a referral (in Canada), and then another 6-8 months to travel. Some of the babies are slightly older, but still young by IA standards. True, many Asian countries have slowed down or even stopped IA's- some due to the Hague, some not. But that is another email...

Hey We where, in Guatemala- see how that turned out! I am replying to your post five years later.... PM me. Does anyone know of any countries we could try? <3 Rich