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Hello all of you wonderful, educated, BRAVE mommies! After reading, what seems like hundreds of threads, I feel like you gals could be most resourceful. I will try to keep this short...notice I said, "try". (smile) My partner's nephew has been ward of the state of CA since 8/2008. Prior to foster care, he bounced from place to place with his birth parents while they fostered their drug habits. He will be 2 this December. My partner's brother, the baby's father, is a complete a total loser. He has seven children, all in the system. For the last year, him and the baby's mother have been homeless, using drugs, and running from the law...and she's pregnant with his number EIGHT! I think they still have parental rights but because they have not made any attempt at contact, let alone reunification, those rights are quickly slipping away. On 9-30-09, there is a court date to determine any progress that the two of them have made in regard to "parenting" this child. The child's maternal grandma has kept us abreast on this entire nightmare and when she informed us that the child would soon be up for adoption, we jumped at the chance. We are only 2 weeks into the process but I am very much a planner/organizer and I need to know what to expect so I can properly plan emotionally, physically, mentally, financially, domestically, etc. So far...we have talked to the child's case worker 3 times. She comes off very flat and we both feel rushed off of the phone which makes us nervous because we want her to like us. She originally stated that she wanted him placed with us before the court date but today when I talked to her, she had no time frame on anything. Our paperwork should (fingers crossed!) arrive tomorrow and we will complete it and fax it back to her immediately. I am aware that home and psychological assessments, as well as criminal history checks need to be completed but how long should we expect that to take? Is there anything we can do to expedite the process? What else can we do, in general? I worry about finances because my partner and I are both in education and coming off of the summer vacation, our funds are LOW. Considering that this will be (I think) a kinship adoption, is there any type of financial support available to us? I asked the case worker today if we would be responsible for the cost of the assessments, background checks, etc. and she said no. Since we will be adopting the child out of the state, will they cover all costs? Will we be eligible for the one time reimbursement from the state? I am assuming that we will be responsible for travel and lodging right? I am still trying to locate a support group that is lesbian-friendly and in the meantime...I have NO ONE to turn to for counsel, advice, venting, etc. This is where you are come in....I hope you have room for one new (hopeful) mommy! Thank you in advance, for everything.
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Hi my name is Beth and I work very closely with CPS in California. I could not tell if you are in California or the nephew. What I know about Sacramento County specifically is that if there is a relative that is appropriate thney will always consider that first. In state out of state it does not matter. It should not cost you anything and once adopted I am not sure if you can get any financial assistance. AS foster parents you can. It is a process that you are the mercy of the social worker to do her job. Might be a good idea to talk to the childs attorney asap also. Good luck! Beth
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Hello friends, I wanted to update you on our situation and ask for any additional advice…hugs and prayers are needed as well! My partner’s nephew has been in foster care in Sacramento since June. The birth parents, my partner’s brother and girlfriend, have been on the run the entire time. They have not seen the baby (he’s 18 months) since April. They have not kept jobs, refuse to complete drug tests, have used methamphetamine, have not kept in contact with their case worker, did not use a FREE bus pass to visit the baby, refuse to submit any contact information because they have not kept a residence for more than a few weeks…and the list goes on and on. The “father” has lost his parental rights. The “mother” still has her rights and is convinced in her coo coo head that their “family” will all be together soon. She is due to deliver my partner’s niece on September 27th. All surrounding county hospitals have been notified and have been instructed to take the baby into protective custody immediately. She will then be returned to Sacramento CPS and placed into temporary foster care. We have taken all of your wonderful advice and have been very proactive. We applied for our foster care license and will complete all home assessments and trainings classes this month. Our goal is to be licensed by September 30th. We stay in CONSTANT contact with the baby’s case worker/supervisor and follow any directions they give to us. We have made it very clear that our intentions are to foster/adopt both children. The ICPC has been completed in CA and will arrive in IN tomorrow. I have already left messages and will call the top person in charge and explain that this is an emergency situation. I will jump on their backs and ride them every day until it is complete and sent back to CA. On September 30th there is a hearing set to evaluate the “mother” and her efforts to be reunited with the baby. The case worker is motioning to terminate services/parental rights. We do not expect the “parents” to show up to court. We don’t even know if her lawyer will show up to court. There is 0 chance that the baby will be reunited with his “parents”. At this point we do not plan on attending the hearing because without knowing if we would be able to take the baby/babies home with us, we cannot afford to take off that much time off of work or travel twice$. In a perfect world, the court would terminate services/parental rights and they would give us the go ahead for placement in IN. We would then travel that weekend and pick up at least one baby. The questions that remain (as of this second) are... 1. How long can we expect for the county to complete a home assessment, submit a modification to the court, and the court sign off on it? 2. Could they use our foster care home assessment information? 3. What is the process once IN sends the ICPC back to CA? What has to happen? 4. If no one shows up to court, will they have a continuance or will they make the decision in her absence? Thank you in advance for all of your “warm and fuzzies” and support! I have been so very thankful for all of your words since day one. Looking forward to hearing from you! P.S. No abbreviations or acronyms…I don’t understand them! :o)