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My husband and I have been connected with a birthcouple that are 19 and 20 years old for about 3 weeks now. We have met with them and talked/texted quite a bit on the phone. After we met last Saturday, the calls haven't been as much as the texting has. I'm confident that everything is still great, moving in the right direction, etc. I'm just curious how much contact most adoptive couples have had with their birthparents throughout the wait (December 10th is the baby's due date). I feel like if we don't talk, he/she will think that we don't care, and on the other hand, I don't want to be a pest/stalker about things either. I'm just wondering if there's a happy median with communication between all of us.
Thank you for your help!
We matched with my son's birth mom when she was 30 weeks pregnant. We talked once a week for 30-45 minutes. Sometimes it was every 2 weeks if she was having a problem with her cell phone. Once a week (scheduled) worked good for us. I think we were all comfortable with the frequency.
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I would come right out and ask the expectant mother and father what they are comfortable with in terms of communication.
Thank you for your responses! I agree that our match is kind of long and that's why we want to be sure that we aren't burning out early with our conversations. We've talked/texted a bunch but have only met once with them for dinner. Their counselor was out of town this week, so we weren't able to get any inside feedback but they are meeting with her this Wednesday. We'll definitely know a little more once that happens and our counselors talk. We texted after the initial meeting and they confirmed they were happy that had chosen us and they had fun, etc., but I agree, some inside feedback would be nice from the counselors. Thank you for your help! ;)
My husband and I are also new to adoption. We were contacted about a private adoption. We met the birthmother about a month ago and I talk to her almost daily via text. We have never spoken over the phone but she seems more comfortable with text. I wasn't sure how to handle the situation but she is the one pursuing the relationship. We will see how this goes!