Thank you so much for the info that has been shared. However, I think I need to clarify and add more details where I couldnt earlier for the sake of time.
He is not ADHD, he has regular, consistant consequences (loss of deserts, playtime, removal of preferred toys, time outs). Then for chores he has had sentences to write, long walks to school, added chores inside and outside, early bedtimes. In all of this he either refuses to do it or blames us because he has to. We lovingly but stearnly remind him that his choices have brought this about. To which he still is in his own reality and insists that we dont have to do this and to give him another chance. We have allowed him to pick his own reward even on a daily basis gradually working up to bigger weekly rewards. He doesnt care. He just tells us that we can give it to him anyway. He is willfull and head strong.
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OK. This helps. I have two suggestions
#1: Stop engaging in so much dialog with FS on it. What I mean by that is that if you have a regular consequence already defined, he breaks a rule the consequence is immediately assigned (each and every time, never miss, never skip, never delay). End. Of. Subject. No debate. No discussion. No dialog. You can't stop him talking but YOU refuse to engage. What we do is in a very neutral manner, return FK to the task/consequence, repeat the behavior/choice and the task/consequense/expectation and walk away. rinse and repeat. (sometimes over and over and over).
#2 simply the rules, find his button and stick to it. I suggest that instead of having all of these various consequences you either let the natural consequence happen (ie having to walk home, no longer having a toy he breaks, etc) or pick just ONE imposed consequence. What is important to him, what does he really like or really hate? It will change with time, but find that one thing that has meaning. then use it as a consequence. Maybe it's going to bed (his room) early. Maybe it's a particulary chore. Or maybe it's having "time in" - having to be with you every moment doing what you are doing. Can you say b.o.r.i.n.g? Then you have to make him do it, consistantly, every time (while still refusing to engage in dialog about it! :) )
I know you said you are consistant...but then you also said he "refuses to do it". So that tells me sometimes he is able to get out of the consequence. This one is a smart cookie and will work any loophole you provide. You are going to have to tighten down on those loopholes. It is going to take an enormous amount of work on your part to extinquish this behavior.
I know you said he doesn't have any "issues" but you might still consider seeking out therapy for him. There is a root here...you can probably bring him around through harda$$ parenting, but it might be easier on all if you can get to the root of it and fix that.