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You know, at one time I was considering a present for a birthmom (in a situation that ultimately did not work out...) and someone warned me that as unintentional as it may be... it could be interpreted as some sort of coercion or at the very least kind of like "guilting" an emom.
I absolutely understand that was NOT your intention, but when someone brought it up to me I really appreciated it... because I didn't want to cross any lines. intentionally or otherwise - kwim?
I think flowers would be a nice gesture though. Personally I wouldn't include a card, but only because I hate writing heart-felt sentiments.
I really don't know though... would love to hear from birthmoms on how they felt about gift giving pre-TPR.