single mom considering adoption for my two year old

Please relax - go to the Dr and get some Anti-Ds. You love your child. Loads of people smoke cigarettes - just try to smoke in the garden. No big deal. If you can, stop work, stop studying, go on welfare and just be with your child for a while until you feel better. You have the rest of your life to pay the US Treasury back. Have a few food stamps now and just breathe and enjoy your baby for a while. Do not give him up to someone because they have more money than you.