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Have you spoken to a counsellor about getting help? Can you get some sort of temporary foster care? Hopefully, there will be other more qualified people on these boards that can help you (I don't live in US so don't know what is available). You are the best choice parent because you are his mum, you just need help.
Now i am back to wanting to. I love my son and don't want to put him up but I don't think I am the best choice parent.
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