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Deb, I think your suggestions are good. The only problem is, how do you maintain those rules forever? So for example, if you adopt them, can your husband never drive your daughter to school? Or take her to her basketball game etc.?
I think they are all essential at least in the short run but I wonder about whether they can be sustained. And if they have to be sustained, how does your husband not feel like a prisoner in your own house, with no freedom to just live normal life.