Started search May '11-scared & excited-any advise?

May 30, 2011

Ready4BMom

Thanks for you reply! It's really nice to know your feelings are shared by someone in a similar situation. So, it sounds like you have not searched yet? Did your non-idenitfying info affect the decision? I have not received my NI Info, but there were descriptions of my BParents with the paperwork my adoptive parents gave me. I know BDad was 22 and "single and carefree" - speaks for itself - and info about his height and weight. My B-Mom was 19 and wanted two parents for the baby. So, basically I know why I was given up, and have no hard feelings, but for the first time, I am curious if either think of me on my BDay, if I have siblings, etc. I received a letter back from LSS that said my BMom has not updated my file since adoption. She may not want communication. We'll see...will you look for the person behind the name?

Kris-- I sent a letter to birth mother about a year ago, by certified mail; it was never signed for. Sent another, less personal, letter about seven months ago; still awaiting a response. Four or five years ago I was in contact with a confidential intermediary who specialized in helping Native American adoptees, but I backed out at that time. I'm thinking of trying to contact her again.

Regarding your speculation on your birth mother's thinking, have you read the book "The Girls Who Went Away"? That book spurred my attempt at reaching out to my birth mother. --Mike