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This isn't related to adoption, but I was hoping to get some advice. (I usually hang out on the foster care boards since we have FKs, so I hope this is ok!) My stepson is 12 (he will be 13 in December). He has lived with his mom and has visited us for summer and holidays as we live about 1500 miles away. This summer SS12 will be coming to live with us full time (and visit his mom summers/holidays). He just completed 7th grade and according to his school should enter 8th grade. The problem is, SS12 has struggled all of his 7th grade year, and finished the year with 2 Fs and 1 D- in core subjects (language arts & math). SS12 started school early (his birthday is in Dec and well past the cutoff) so he is the youngest person in his class, and emotionally/developmentally is young for his age. Due to his poor performance last year, and that he started school early, I think now would be a good time to have him repeat the grade. He doesn't know any students here, so it would give him a chance to gain a better understanding of the material and not having to play "catch up" for high school. It would also allow him to be one of the middle/older children in his grade rather than the youngest. Has anyone had their child repeat a grade? What were the positives or negatives about it? Especially with a child that is in middle school. Thanks!
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I think this will be the best opportunity you will ever have to have him repeat a grade. From personal experience, I was always the youngest in my grade, I was bright and had no problem with school work but I feel I was emotionally less mature and could have done with starting a year later. Some pupils were almost two years older than me and the differences really started showing in secondary school. My nephew stayed back a year when my sister moved, he is doing great. She says it was the best decision she ever made for him.
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Well, after talking with all our parents, we came up with a pro/con list for both options. Then we presented it to SS and explained our concerns and explained our list. We also explained our expectations for school when he lives with us. After talking for about an hour, SS said that he felt it would be better for him if he stayed back a year. So, it looks like that is what we are going to do. I hope it will help that he has part ownership of the decision and will put him on the right path for the rest of his education!