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My husband and I have been considering adoption. We have been trying to find some advice and people's experience on having a biological child and then adopting a child internationally and then having another biological child. Has anyone done this? Thoughts? Concerns? I can't find anywhere that people are talking about this and would really like more information! Thanks.
I did - by accident ;) but still that is what we did. Our bio son was almost 2 when we adopted our other 2 sons, then ages 3 and 4, and 9 months later I found out I was pregnant (unexpectedly - although we were fertile) with son #4. I was VERY concerned that our adopted sons would feel replaced by our bio son, but we worked hard to help them feel part of the process of the pregnancy and my one son did say it best when he said that "he is the first one we have ALL had from the beginning". We did lots to help our newly adopted sons picture our future WITH them after the new baby was born etc (talking about being big brothers, going on family trips etc).
Saying that, I do strongly believe that a child should not be a racial minority only in a family IF AT ALL POSSIBLE. So if you don't intend to adopt again, I would adopt two children from the same country so they have some reflection of race and heritage within their family. It can be very isolating to be an only.
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