My child doesn't want anything to do with me.

To all adoptees, please help me to understand. I am angry, hurt, and depressed. My child doesn't want anything to do with me. It was an open adoption and the birth mother stopped including me. I accepted that figuring she didn't want to confuse her. Now I realize it was something totally different. My child was fed a pack of lies about me. How do I know? The letter she wrote me was intentionally very hurtful and painful. That was in 02/2010. The facts were twisted and untrue. It's as if the adoptive mom painted me to be an uncaring, compulsive lying monster. I don't know what to do. I have three other children and this is affecting me terribly. I keep it to myself. I think it's making me ill. I think about her daily. I have been writing her non-stop for over two years now. I received just the one negative reply. I have tears in my eyes now. I have attended counseling for this. It did very little good. I need to accept things and move on. If she really wanted a relationship of any kind with me, she wouldn't let what someone has told her about me stop her. She was open to the idea. Then she just cut me off. All in one week. I gave her up for adoption when she was three days old. I placed her in her adoptive mother's arms. I feel as if I'm being forced to give her up again. I need to face reality. I gave her up and I will regret it until the day I die. I need to learn how to live with it. Anything anyone can share on this will be tremendously appreciated. Best regards, Bleeding Heart