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Ok, just giving my opinion. But this is one of the major reasons I will only work with little ones. MY bios are 14 and 12 and have never spoken to me like that. Yes, I get attitude, but not disrespect.
I've heard kids push hardest right before adoption to test your commitment, so that may be it. But not confronting this behavior that is obviously giving you so much grief is only a pass for her to keep it up.
If this child is only 9, I imagine this behavior is only going to get worse. Unless you have signed yourself up as therapeutic or are willing to deal with troubled behavior, I would really consider what you want the next 10 years of home life to look like.
Again, just my opinion.