what is your advice for best route for us?

My experience is of foster-adopting an older child, and there were lots of emotional issues. It sounds to me like foster-adopting an infant might be appropriate for you. One of the foster adopt parents that spoke to us during training had adopted several babies from foster care, but I think she was willing to adopt babies with issues (fetal alcohol effects maybe). I don't know if there are any age limitations. I spoke to one foster mom who was 60 yrs old and she was adopting an infant (one with FAE or FAS, but she knew what she was getting into because she'd been doing straight foster care for 20 years). I'd recommend that you call all the counties around where you live and find out what their requirements are, what their process is, and whether they have infants. When I was researching I found that my own county had virtually no placements of any age, but a county in the city regularly had infants, and had over 300 adoptions (all ages) each year.

Here are my questions: what is the best route for adoption: private attorney? In your circumstances and because few states have babies available for adoption from foster care (w/o having to deal with possibility they'll go back to bios)...I would strongly consider an adoption agency or adoption attorney. If an adoption attorney, wise to consider one who belongs to the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys: [url=http://www.adoptionattorneys.org/directory_map.asp]American Academy of Adoption Attorneys -[/url] what is the best route for foster to adopt? Our family has adopted privately and through foster care. Our experiences with foster to adopt were NOT good ones; and, because it's rare to get an infant through foster care to adopt, I'd discourage it altogether. Most children to adopt through the foster care system are older (3yrs and up). Even at 2 and 3yrs, it's more likely than not that you'd have a child with significant emotional issues...and with your son being so young, it wouldn't be in the best interest of your son or your family to adopt a child who would need a great amount of attention because of those emotional needs/damages. we are open to: children under five (See above comments about emotionally damaged children---even at the ages of 2yrs and 3yrs) we are open to foreign adoption Do-able. Consult an adoption agency near you. we are open to children with physical disabilities but not emotional. ----Which is why adoption from foster care may not be your best route. we are open to transracial adoption. Excellent....which is why private domestic adoptions may be what you're looking for; and, why international adoption may be as well. we would love a baby, toddler or small child. Personally, at this point...with such a young son......I wouldn't advise adopting a child older than 1yr-18mos at most. Please feel free to pm me if I can be of any help. Our family has adopted in many different ways. Sincerely, Linny