Want to Adopt, but Not Infertile

We have 3 bio kids and adopted 2 internationally. We did not have any infertility issues. I have met lots of families that have children that have come to the family in a variety of ways. Marymom to Bobby 14, Bridget 13, Angela 11, Eddie 7 (home 2005) and Naldo 4 (home 2008)

I know many people who do this. My family has 3 bio kids and 1 adopted (well, in the process). No fertility issues, just wanted a little girl without going through physically being pregnant.A close family "thought" they could have children. Decided to adopt, got pregnant and adopted, got pregnant again. Now have three lovely kids ages 3,4&5. It's not uncommon or weird to do that. Many people only adopt when they could easily have bio kids. You want a child, so why shouldn't you adopt? Who cares if you have fertility issues or not. Good luck!

Oops, meant our close family thought they COULDN'T have kids, not could.

Same as gracegirl - I knew since I was a child myself that one day I will adopt children. I do not have infertility problems. I just knew that there were many children who needed parents, so it was clear to me that I would adopt. I clearly remember a discussion I had with my three best friends as a teenager - them telling me that I would want a "child of my own" and me arguing that an adopted child is "my own". It was also clear to me since I was a child that I will adopt transracially. I envisioned adopting children of different ethnicities different so that we would look like the United Nations. That's exactly how my family looks like today. Every bit of my childhood vision became a reality. mrshistory, you should never feel a need to "explain" why you want to adopt :) People adopt for many reasons. Adoption is, God forbid, not a plan B to parenthood due to infertility! Some parents adopt due to infertility but others feel called by the Divine, others see it as an act of social justice/equal distribution of resources and yet other just don't know why but are pulled to it ... Go for it, and congratulations to your decision. :cheer: Adopted children bring so much happiness. Adoption is the best thing I chose in my life and compares no nothing else I ever did.

mrs.history, let me tell you, that is not weird AT ALL. Some families are called to have biological and some families are called too adopt. I am on the same boat as you, people ask me, " why don't you just have your own if you are able to? " , now first thing I don't like the term " your own " because once you adopt the child they are " your own " , I think a better term would be " biological " . Everyone is different and I think that every child deserves to have a family that loves them.

My husband and I also always felt drawn to adoption. We have three kids by birth and one by adoption (our youngest, int'l adoption). We know several families who are similarly constructed and are so happy with the way our family has come together. Wishing you peace and clarity as you make decisions! Best, Jennifer Grant (I have written a number of posts about international adoption for adoption.com. You can find some of my posts at jennifergrant.com.)

Thank you all for your responses!! They are wonderful!!

It is absolutely fine. There are lots of fertile families who pursue international adoption. I have been working as an adoption facilitator in Ukraine since 1999 and have helped over 200 American families adopt from Ukraine. So I can say that a good fifth of the families who adopted through me were fertile and Ukrainian laws does not cause any problems or prohibitions for fertile couples if they decide to adopt.If you need any other help or support, you can email me at adoptionsurrogacy@gmail.com

It is absolutely fine. There are lots of fertile families who pursue international adoption. I have been working as an adoption facilitator in Ukraine since 1999 and have helped over 200 American families adopt from Ukraine. So I can say that a good fifth of the families who adopted through me were fertile and Ukrainian laws does not cause any problems or prohibitions for fertile couples if they decide to adopt. If you need any other help or support, you can email me at adoptionsurrogacy@gmail.com

We have two fantastic girls I birthed. We feel there are plenty of babies needing healthy homes. We also would like a boy. All my pregnancies were healthy in my 30s, but I will be 41..I really really wish adoption was not so expensive and we are worried we will not get "picked". Our county connections in fost-adopt have told us we would have to wait years for a child under 2, especially if we are gender specific so we see the 20K we are going to have to pay (after tax credit) as our contribution to environmental and social principles (though I completely support families who want to birth more kids - I sure am tempted!) and the luxury we are privledged with to select adopting a boy. I know that we will get grief for gender selecting... not sure how to answer that... we are open to just about everything there is to consider, but we want our girls to have a brother.

FWIW, most families who have a gender preference want girls, so you probably won't catch too much grief for wanting a boy.

hye.. im hanna, anyone want agirl..14 years old ..name ieyfa.. please indox me now.. she are lovely girl...also she caring :love: :love:

If you wish to make an adoption plan for this child, please contact the child welfare authorities in your country. They will make a determination about whether the child's biological parents (if alive, whereabouts are known, and competent legally to make decisions) are willing to relinquish her for adoption, or if the child is in an unsafe situation and must be removed from her home. If the child is adoptable, then efforts will be made to find the child a home in her own country of citizenship. If no home can be found, and your country permits international adoption, then the authorities will place the child with people overseas who have been approved to adopt, who can meet her needs, and who are willing to take on the responsibility of parenting a teen. A court of law in your country will issue an adoption decree and some paperwork that will be needed for her immigration to the country of the new parents' citizenship. Please remember that adoption involves the permanent surrendering of parental rights by the biological family, and the creation of a new legal relationship by a court of law, in which the adoptive parents agree to take on full responsibility for the child and to treat her as if they gave birth to her. Adoption must conform to the laws of the child's country of citizenship and the laws of the prospective parents' country of citizenship. If such laws are not obeyed, then the adults involved can be prosecuted for child trafficking, as serious crime in most countries. Please protect Ieyfa and ensure that she does not become the victim of illegal and unethical practices. Sharon

I am so glad someone posted this, and to know I'm not alone!I never really wanted biological kids/to have a baby/pregnancy but I knew I wanted a family. I have some serious issues with having a child biologically (not infertile that I know of, and nothing against people that want bio kids at all! I just have some things to work on before I would ever be comfortable having a biological child). Luckily my husband and I had talked about it before marriage, and he's on board with adoption. We just started the process this month, and are very excited :)

We have 2 bio daughters, & probably could have had more but we chose to adopt instead. We adopted a 4 year old boy from China.