single mother of 3-year-old twins seeking advice

I would also suggest that you take a serious look at why you don't believe your own Mom did a good job raising you. If she was abusive, then I would agree with your assessment and say that your children do not need to be in a home with abuse. Is it possible that you hold some responsibility for your actions and you are blaming your current situation on your Mother?(I'm not saying you're fully responsible here) Parents can influence many things and sometimes children will do as the wish and ignore their parents. Some parents simply do not know how to parent, but that does not mean they are horrible people.