Bmom's parents warning against open adoption

All you can do at this point is set boundaries and abide by them. If the bmom does things after placement that bothers you or makes you uncomfortable you will have to re-establish the boundaries. There could be a lot of things at play in this situation. As for now if you are comfortable that is really all you can go on unless you feel that the bmom's mom is a crediable source of information. As with all open adoptions (legally enforceable or not) I suggest that everyone know the guidelines for contact ahead of time. Don't agree to things you are not comfortable with and make sure the agreement can change if needed.