My husband and. We're devastated to just receive a letter saying the Gladney Agency had turned down our application for adopting with them. I ne'er even considered that happening. I don't get it. We are a very stable loving family with a 2 year old?? Why did we get turned down? I am devastated.
Agencies and/or attorneys can refuse to include you in their pool for just about any reason. One refusal we heard was because we'd adopted a couple of times already. Another was because we weren't infertile.
I'd definately want to know *why* they refused you; but realize this isn't the end of the world. There are good and bad agencies and as others have said, there are a LOT of agencies in this nation. I would be especially curious though, as to why you didn't realize you'd be turned down from the beginning...rather than having to wait for a letter from an agency?
Evenso, pick yourself and go on to the next agency and/or attorney. Much of the adoption journey has to do with perseverance. It will serve you well in times like these.
Good luck.
Sincerely,
Linny
Thank you all...I feel better today. Still very down because this agency was the one i really felt a connection with...none of the others, so I feel i have to start a whole new list of ones I like.
As far as asking why-- They will not tell me why. I have asked several times with the " adoption intake coordinator" and she is not even given the information. She said their is a board of members who make the decision...I dont think I can find out the WHY part. What she DID say was that it def could of been because we already have a child and the wait is so much longer for those couples. She said they dont take more than they know they can match in a timely manner.
Whatever.
If yall now of any great adoption agencies in texas-- let me know :)
Thank you all
I could not respond to your last message because your mailbox is full - please just let me know when you have room and I will send info. :-)
My guess is it is totally not personal and just a numbers thing. I know it feels huge to you but they probably did you a favor. A lot of agencies will only work with 20 people or so at a time. Once their list gets so big that they have more than double to waiting list to get into the 20, they do turn people down unless the paps are looking for traditionally hard to place babies and have big budgets. My guess is that it is totally not personal but they probably could have told you from the first phone call.
We were not accepted by a couple agencies because we already had a biological child and were not infertile.
We were turned down by Gladney too. At the time I was devastated. I couldn't understand why they would turn us down. I never did get an answer from Debbie the intake coordinator.
That denial turned out to be a blessing in disguise. At the time I didn't realize that locking yourself to one agency is not the fastest way to adopt. A few days later we signed up with One World Adoptions referral service. We were matched within hours and our daughter was born that same week. Many of the people who signed with Gladney at the time that we were rejected are still waiting and our beautiful daughter will be a year old next month.
My advice to you is to sign up with many different referral services like One World, Little Bit of Heaven, Bundle of Joy, Heaven Sent, etc...don't lock yourself into an agency.
The referral services I mentioned are licensed adoption agencies not facilitators, with the exception of Bundle of Joy.
Thank you all for your encouragement. It made me feel better that someone else was turned down by them :) ha! I have never heard of referral services - I will research :)
Texas- It was a crazy whirlwind! We still look back and think did that really happen?!!?
I think there were a few things that helped us adopt so quickly. We had a pdf copy of our homestudy and our profile so we could email it to agencies. I think that having a professional looking profile really helped. We used Shutterfly and I looked at professional adoption profile websites to get ideas.
When we signed up with all of the referral services we were immediately presented with at least 5 situations. All of the birthmothers were due within 2 weeks so they were eager to look at profiles and make a decision.
I think being ready to submit our homestudy and profiles immediately really helped!
Good luck Texas!
oregongirl
Texas- It was a crazy whirlwind! We still look back and think did that really happen?!!?
I think there were a few things that helped us adopt so quickly. We had a pdf copy of our homestudy and our profile so we could email it to agencies. I think that having a professional looking profile really helped. We used Shutterfly and I looked at professional adoption profile websites to get ideas.
When we signed up with all of the referral services we were immediately presented with at least 5 situations. All of the birthmothers were due within 2 weeks so they were eager to look at profiles and make a decision.
I think being ready to submit our homestudy and profiles immediately really helped!
Good luck Texas!
We used One World, too (and Shutterfly!) we were getting calls before our home study was done. We had to wait a lot longer than Oregongirl, though...it took us two months from the day our home study was complete until l
peanut came home with us! :love: Facilitators are illegal in my State, too, but One World is a licensed adoption agency.
Were you turned down before orientation or after? We are in the application phase and that makes me nervous! Hang in there!! :)
Turned down right after that first application! Had not attended the orientation :(
I have come to think it was due to me just finishing a round of IVF... But I will never know!great luck