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I'm new here and hoping for a solution.
Our child goes to school with a lot of girls that are in a clique. She appears to be on the outside the few times I have seen all the girls together - and she comes homes complaining of other girls and boys making fun of her at times.
She also is more and more interested in T.V. and eating.
I have her engaged in extracurricular activities that I had to push her into - however - while there - she truly DOES appear to be enjoying herself. (Caught big smiles).
It saddens me, though, that she only seems to have one close friend - and it's a boy - and this has been the case for a few years.
She used to have one friend (girl) who "turned on her" and has been VERY cruel to her.
I admit, my daughter does love to play the victim. Not sure if this is learned from being picked on so much over the years (she is 10), or if it's an attention-seeking thing because she feels so much "on the outside" all the time.
She does seems very socially awkward - always has.
Any help/words of advice? Been there, done that? I have her signed up for therapy soon - so this will be addressed. Meanwhile, it's a lonely summer for her. Maybe I am overanalyzing things - but when you see all her classmates online at birthday parties and pool parties and she's not included - as a mom - your heart breaks. :(
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Welcome - I am not an AP but it must be hard to watch - I think activities and counselling are good choices - are there any children's activities that help with social awkardness or improve self worth - girl scouts - dance - volunteering with the local humane society? It is hard to be on the outside looking in - especially at that age - I would think it is the bullying over the victim... Bumping this up in the new post stream for those with real advice to read. Kind regards,Dickons
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I just noticed this thread . . .
Your description of your daughter reminds me a little of me when I was a child. I tended to have only 1 friend at a time from 4th grade to high school. I was pretty shy and am quite introverted. Nothing wrong with being introverted but being shy made things pretty tough at times. I STRONGLY recommend the book "The Introvert Advantage" if your daughter is an introvert. It really helped me understand how my perspective on things differs from extroverts and why I have certain personality traits. It's a wonderful book. Shyness, at least at the level I had it, can be overcome. My dad used to coach me on how to talk to people and make me practice - something like "behavior therapy" I suppose. I can't speak to the issue of playing the victim. I mostly wanted to recommend that book if it applies and to wish you well. I hope therapy is helping!
:)