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My husband and I are pursuing a county adoption through an FFA. However, when asked, most of church members wonder why we aren't going through LDSFS. We really felt like it was right for us to go through the county for a few reasons, one of which being that we aren't necessarily wanting a baby (0-3), and of course the cost is free. We opted to give this a year or so and then we may go with LDSFS if things don't work out. Are any other church members out there who have gone county? Feeling a wee bit alone on this boat! Ha ha
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We had an almost adoption through a neighboring county. They were wonderful. I was so impressed with the social workers, guardian ad litem, and others involved. Unfortunately, the grandparents changed their minds and stepped in at the 11th hour so we had to give him back after a month. Even with that, I would do it again if I lived in that county. They have a strong foster/adopt program. Our county only does adoptions for foster children over the age of 8 so it isn't an option based on where we live. If it was, it would be the only way I would adopt.
Thank you both for your replies. We are very lucky in that there are a lot of under age three adoptions in our county. We are hoping for sisters both under three. At least, that's our goal. We pray for whatever Heavenly Father thinks is right. It feels like either way there's a lot of waiting and hoping and praying.
It was a while ago (our youngest is 17) but we adopted our last four kids through agencies other than LDS. With the fifth child, we applied with LDS, for whom I had been volunteering for more than a year. I knew that we needed a home study, but knew all along that he wouldn't come through them. We found him the day before our last interview for our home study. A week later, our study was finished and I flew down to Arizona to pick him up. Our third was born while we were in Germany and the German social worker there handled it all. In Las Vegas, we went through the state and adopted a baby girl with very serious health issues. Just a few days ago, she located her birth father, who is thrilled to hear from her (she's 21, now). He hadn't even known if she would still be alive, so it was really a shock hearing from her. I helped her find him, and also found my third child's birth mother, myself. I just felt a strong drive to find her and it has all worked out great.LDS can only handle so many adoptions. You just need to be prayerful and seek guidance as where you need to look for your child.
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We adopted our first two through the state foster care system and we're currently matched with an e-mom who is a friend of a family member.We considered LDSFS for a split second, but had so many friends wait so long to be matched. We didn't want to wait to have children in our home.We had two foster placements reunify before our forever children came to us. They had been in 3 foster homes before as well.I'm grateful things worked out the way they did.You are not alone.
We are adopting kids through foster care. They are out-of-state kids and were placed with us for adoption three months ago yesterday! It took us almost six years to get to this point, but it was the plan He had for us. I've known these kids were waiting for us for seven years next month. Amazing since the youngest turns six this month. I guess Heavenly Father had an adoption plan for him before he was conceived.
We just finalized the adoption of our three and went through an independent agency who works with the counties where we live. We were asked many times by others why we chose not to do LDSFS. We had many reasons, but ultimately felt that going through the county was the best route for us. We enjoyed working with the county and FFA, and adopted children out of the Foster System, we are happy with our decision.
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haneyfam
We just finalized the adoption of our three and went through an independent agency who works with the counties where we live. We were asked many times by others why we chose not to do LDSFS. We had many reasons, but ultimately felt that going through the county was the best route for us. We enjoyed working with the county and FFA, and adopted children out of the Foster System, we are happy with our decision.
I neglected to say that we adopted our first two through was was then LDS Social Services, in 1983 and 1986. Back then, they would not allow any form of contact, no pictures, nothing. The birth mom was just supposed to go and try to forget that she ever had a baby and we weren't supposed to be able to get any feedback on her, either. With my second son's adoption, I asked the social worker if he could let me know if they heard any more from her, just so I would know she was OK. He told me that she was getting on with her life and would not appreciate me sticking my nose into her business! Before we left that area, I took a snapshot of the baby and a short letter and asked if they would keep it in their files, in case she ever contacted them some day and asked if they knew anything about him. That was refused and I was again assured that she was forgetting him and wanted nothing to do with us. On our son's 21st birthday, his birth mom hired a private investigator to locate him. Arizona law permitted searching once the child was 21. This women I had been assured was forgetting him had this great big notebook she had been keeping for him, all those years, with pictures taken while she was pregnant, letters to him, birthday cards, etc.. That was five years ago, and we are all still in touch. In fact, I just talked to her this morning.Anyway, it sounds like I am totally off topic, but I am really only taking it on a little side trip. The last contact I had with them was in 1987, before we moved to Germany. Four years later, after we were back in Utah, I was called to be a volunteer for both the Logan and Ogden offices. I couldn't believe it was the same agency, because so much had changed! They were not only accepting pictures and letters, they were requiring the adoptive parent to provide those! They were even allowing phone calls and face to face meetings (under assumed names). The whole attitude had changed, especially in the amount of compassion toward birth moms. I have always been so impressed that they were willing to make such huge changes, and I believe it is because they listened to the spirit and also the letters they were getting from birth moms and adoptees. It made more work for them, but they did it out of love. That doesn't mean that every case has been handled perfectly, but I know it has been a huge improvement.On the topic, back in 1993, when I told them that we were going to buy the home study from them and pick up a baby from a different agency in another state, they were like, "Are you SURE you're getting the right baby?" Yes, I was sure, and I'm still sure! The Holy Ghost will lead us to our children, no matter where they happen to be.
Wow, thank you for sharing your story! What an amazing bio mom to save all those items and wait 21 years to reunite with her son. I'm so glad you have an amiable relationship. We are waiting until summer and then we may consider going to LDS family service. That is if we don't feel like we've moved ahead with county at all. Right now county feels right but we'll be praying and staying open minded so the spirit can guide us to our children.
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Hi MountainMommy, We too are going through the county and a lot of people in our ward ask us why we aren't going through the church services. We feel like this is what we are supposed to be doing right now and it is working out a lot better than I ever imagined. We are adoption only and we are looking for a sibling group from Infant- 13yrs. The process has actually been a lot faster and smoother than I ever would have thought possible. We feel so blessed to be working with many great social/case workers. I wish you the best of luck in your adoption process and I hope everything works out for you in end :-)