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This is for the original poster. If you are still checking in on this topic starter, I suggest you go to the adult adoptee boards because you will get some helpful advice from adult adoptees who have experienced being an adoptee and the consequences of that. Some there may have had an experience likes yours and can give you tips on how to preceed or continue.
Based on the little bit you have given, I encourage you to persue your husband getting his son. There is nothing wrong with his wanting to be in his son's life now that he is more aware of the big picture. I do think he should have started earlier, but it isn't too late. In the process, I hope you will obtain a DNA test to be sure.