Heavey Heart

I think it just shows that you are a compassionate and loving person. I agree that many people don't initially think about how hard it has to be for the e-moms until you actually talk to them or get to know their story. It has to be one of the hardest things a person will ever do in their lives and it is ultimately so sad that any woman is in a situation where they have to place their baby. I love J's b-mom dearly and pray for her regularly. She's had a tough life and I would have to be a really cold-hearted person to not be sad for her. It sounds like you already know this, but be prepared for a big mix of emotions when the baby is actually born. We were so overjoyed to have our baby boy, but at the same time my heart was breaking for his birthfamily and the loss they were experiencing. You will have course have to follow e-mom's wishes, but I find that having a really open relationship and treating J's birthfamily like extended family has really helped them. They never have to feel like they are excluded from his life, because they aren't.