Cant stop crying

I also had another question for you. On your blog, right before he was moved, you said the CW told you that they had two adoptive families identified for him and that he would be moving. What became of those families? Why did he move to another foster home if they had two adoptive families lined up?

That is a good question. She mentioned that the sw said she did not want any foster parents claiming rights to him. If the sw wanted him adopted through a private agency, it is possible the two potential families did not have foster care licenses. He was placed with a couple in their 70's until he is legally free to be adopted.

Thank you all for looking into my blog. I am trying to figure out how to make it private as of now and going through to remove something. I have had my ffa director read the entire thing and she has no problem with anything posted but I will still be editing it to make it much less specific based on your guys suggestions. I have changed my name on my fb account to also be more anonymous. I am not expecting my county to place with me so I am going to continue to go to school full time for family law and start working part time. Csw did claim two families were identified for Doc but there has been nothing further done in regards to these identified families, I honestly do not know if this is even a true statement. My lawyer has contacted the local news and they are very interested in running an article. This will be the second week in a row that my county has been criticized in the media for like situations on top of the long running articles about a baby who was supposed to be under the watch of my county that has been missing for over a year, presumed dead now.I would absolutely would love to be given the chance to raise Doc for the rest of my life but I can honestly tell you all that if he was placed in an adoptive home tomorrow I would not fight the placement in any way, though I would continue to raise awareness about the unnecessary disruption of his placement and many other placements that have been brought to my attention here in my county. He deserves to be placed in a home where he will remain for the rest of his life. If the county said I could have him back in my home with the potential for it not to be forever I would not agree to have him moved back because he does have a bond with his current foster family that needs to be respect. I want his next move to be his very last move. Infants are resilient but they do not need to be forced to be this resilient.

If anyone who has read my blog has specific suggestions as to what needs to be revised/removed please direct me towards your suggested removal. And I am going to be insisting that everything that is ran about Doc will not have my name in it nor my photo. There was NEVER going to be Docs name or photo in the articles!

The only other suggestion besides the pics and birth parent info would be to go back over any negative comments about the cw. Most cws are too busy to check these forums or look for foster parent blogs but if she or one of her co-workers did find it, it might affect future placements with you. I haven't heard of someone having a problem with a sw reading something that was written about them but it could happen.

Nothing has come of these apparent two lined up identified families. I truly believe that this was a false statement because there has been no further talk of identified families. When she told me that there were identified families it was about 1/2 hour after we had last spoken, csw and I, and then she seemed to pull this out of the air.

In our case our daughter was removed from a foster home that she had been in for almost 4 months. They were willing to adopt her, but the CW felt it was not a good match. They seeked us out as an adoptive family and moved her within a week or two. The former foster mom was devastated. She was just told that we were a better fit.

I personally would take the blog completely down if possible. Sharing anything regarding a foster child or sharing about a legal situation can cause a lot of problems.

sorry I wasn't saying they needed an alias for the child. I was meaning give her an alias like they will with the child - Use an alias for her AND the child.

I would not be super psyched about a lawyer whose first move was to go to the media. I would rather they file something in court.I'm sorry for your sadness and frustration, but I agree that three months is no time at all, in foster care terms, and you will have a VERY difficult road to travel in trying to prove a bond between you and Doc, who was so little at the time and is likely to have forgotten you.If you want to advocate for the child, a lawyer might file a case on his behalf as having been maltreated by the system (there is currently a big class action suit being tried in my state by former foster children who claim the state did not protect them adequately while they were in care), but as a foster parent you have no standing in his court case (unless a lawyer files it and the judge grants it) and you have no rights to the child. Don't get your hopes up.A drug-addicted woman who asks you to adopt her child is not going to hold any water, either. It could be argued she is not in her right mind, and if her child is in state custody, it's not up to her where he goes anymore. You called his placement with you "preadoptive"--was it based on this woman's having asked you that??? If the caseworker made it clear to you from the beginning that she did not want to discuss adoption, then clearly adoption was not the goal.I think you set yourself up for heartbreak with unreasonable expectations, and you're only prolonging it by trying to get the child back into your care. I cannot imagine a situation where you and this baby are reunited. You should probably be talking to a therapist or grief counselor, not a lawyer.

I am seeing an amazing therapist who was a cps caseworker prior to getting her doctorate so thats already covered. We have already filed with the courts and that is moving along. The lawyers first step was not to get this story into the media. There has been a violation of Docs rights as a ward of the state and this is not an isolated event, it is happening to may babies in my county. I already am well aware that i as a foster parent have no rights to him. I made the initial post on this forum in a desperate attempt to find support here from foster parents who could lend an listening ear. This have changed within the last 12 hours in regards to this case. It will be heard in court next month and I am sitting down with the RU side of CPS head honcho directors boss. It is progressing as I have figured it would. This event has lead to many good things in regards to shedding light of issues that need to be address by our local assembly. There are also currently two class action law suits against my county by former foster children.

I see what you are saying. Sorry for the misunderstanding. Seems like the media doesn't even use that route anymore. Now they just say details withheld.

To the OP -- I'm sorry about what you went through. I hope your actions result in some improvement by your county. To other posters - I love this forum but sometimes I am appalled at how rude and judgey people get. We don't know all of the details of what's going on, so of course everything is not going to make sense 100%. We are all here to support each other. If you think someone's story doesn't add up, then would it kill you to just move on and not say anything rather than make remarks about how fishy you think it is? No matter what the exact details of the OP's situation are, she was clearly devastated by the loss of her FS. Many of us can relate to that ... and even if she "only" had him for 3 months that doesn't make the loss any less painful. Please think before you post and how you would feel if you came here for support and instead only got posts about how your story "doesn't add up". You are not a juror in a trial ... you are a member of a forum for SUPPORT.

It is obvious from the blog, how much she cares for Doc. She does have a chance at getting him back with a lawyer willing to work pro-bono. From the blog, she is only 26 and still in college, but is willing to find work to show ability to support him and pass a homestudy. She did come here for support and advice. I think some people had questions to better understand the situation and possibly offer advice that might be helpful.

Even if the odds of getting Doc back are slim, her county may improve because of this case. Doc was taken without valid reason or proper notice. Instead of sitting done with her and discussing possible obstacles to adoption, the sw responded to her inquiry on adoption by removing him from her care. Doc will have at least one more move because he has been placed with an elderly couple who can't adopt him. Three months is long enough to bond, and even if he can't remember her, it is likely that something about her would be familiar to him and the bond would still be there if she does defy the odds and is able to re-unite with Doc.