what does baby call you?

Mine all call me mom and my husband dad. We introduced ourselves originally with our first names, and literally about 20 minutes after they arrived they asked if they could call us mom and dad. We have other kids, too, so it helps everyone be on the same page. But no matter what I wouldn't encourage them to call me "foster mom" because then EVERYONE knows that they're in foster care, and I think that's very private information. So if anything I'd encourage first names or auntie or something like that. But I have no problem with kids calling me mom. I think all kids need and deserve to have a mom.

MamaJasmine, we need a like button! we introduce by our first names and then let it go. they'll find their level. most have opted for mama and daddy. my very favorite was from a 2 yr old Hispanic girl. to her, i was Dama Mamacita.

So, "Mum" , leave out the "foster" and that should be fine? I'm acting AS the child's parents and providing a 23 X 7 level of parental care, right? I still refer to my mother's best friend as Aunt Liz. She was my godmother, since my mom's sibs live 1000 miles away. So, the title is based on the care and commitment, not biology. I found a note from 7 months ago, from bio dad. He wrote a letter and refered to us as "Foster Mom and Dad". I guess that helps give at least one bio's approval to the name "mum".

When our current FK's CASA came to our home for the first time, she was talking to the baby and referred to us as Mommy and Daddy!

My kids are all older teens and we tell them they can call us whatever, first names, mom/dad, aunt/uncle, ? just no swears or calling me late for dinner (which doesn't happen cuz I make it LOL). The boys we have now call us mom and dad and I refer to us that way. They are 18 and 19, came at 17 and 18. Other kids have called us mostly by our first names. One called me mom and my husband by his first name.

Our kiddos see their bio mom fairly often, as well as bio grandparents. They know their family and call them Mommy, Grandma X, Grandpa Y, Daddy, etc. They have a very maternal relationship with one of their grandmothers too. They sometimes call her Mommy-Grandma.I don't think it's necessary to further confuse the issue with two more moms. So they call us by first names. We introduced ourselves that way and don't have any other kids so that's all they ever hear anyone call us. When their preschool or agency refers to us as mom we usually let it slide once or twice, but if they keep it up, we smile and say "They just call us by first names!" We're not the same race as these kids, we're two women, it's pretty obvious we are not the bio parents anyway, this isn't news to anyone. It also clearly bothers/confuses the 3 year old when people refer to us as her moms. Someone will say something like "bring this to your Mommy" and she'll look at me like, "but my mom isn't here????" With the kids, if they call either of us Mommy, it's not a problem, we just carry on with the conversation. Example: this morning my wife had to take the 3 year old to the doctor, so they didn't come with us to school as they usually would. The 2 year old cried and said "Where did [wife's name] go? I want Mommy...I want [wife's name]!" I just responded normally, explaining that she had to take big sis to a doctor's appointment. The reality is, we are not their moms. We know it, they know it, anyone who sees us knows it. Pretending otherwise would be confusing and disingenuous. We tell them we love them, we call them "our girls" or "my baby" or say we are going home to "our house". Those things are true even if we are not Mommy. For what it's worth some people at the agency have actually been quite happy with us for not insisting on the mommy label. These kids are not headed for TPR, all signs point to RU with a mom they know and love. I have no problem acknowledging that in the way I relate to these kids. If things change...language might change too. But for now we are a happy family using first names.

We were told to expect them to call us whatever our kids already call us. DD calls DH 'Mr. First Name', so that will likely stick!

All but one of our FKs started calling us mommy and daddy within a few days of moving in. We stopped trying to correct them. At some point most, if not all, children will automatically refer to their caregivers as mom & dad. It's just natural to them. This coming from the very first dev specialist we worked with.

I struggled with this one. Our FD was only 9 months old when she came. We decided to call ourselves "Auntie" and "Uncle." I told this to bio mom and she was fine with it. Fast forward 9 months and FD is now 18 months old. She has picked up what the other kids (ours) call us and now calls us Mommy and Daddy. I like it b/c it's simpler for our kids and for us. It makes my heart melt every time, and that's why *I* wanted to be "Auntie." I felt like it gave me some distance from her in my heart, since she is most likely going home. I must say, it was easier to keep my heart guarded when we were calling ourselves Auntie and Uncle. Bio mom knows now that FD calls me mommy. While she told me she understands and it's better than the other option (that FD is scared of me or something), when I show up to pick up FD from visit (I take her from bio mom) and FD reaches out to me saying "Mommy, mommy!" her bio mom will turn her around and say "I'm mommy :)" I don't blame mom at all. That must be tough watching your baby call another woman mommy. We only take babies, but if we had an older child, I would be totally fine with whatever they wanted to call us :)

Kiddo was situational: I was 'Missy' when it was us; 'Miss Missy' around his mom; Aunt Missy around my family; Mom around the neighborhood kids; Step-Mom (he didn't like foster) at school. He could keep it all straight so I fine with all of them. BG started off calling me Aunt Missy but over 6 months or so, he started calling me 'Mommy'. His folks really dislike it but the SSW said it's a comfort to him so let him call you want he wants. Sometimes, usually after a visit, he'll switch back to aunt but it only lasts a day or two.

I usually take preschoolers or early elementary aged kids. Most start with calling me by my first name. Later I usually become Mama First name. After a long while they drop first name and I become Mama. I let the kid take the lead. I have never had a cw complain and most have helped the parent understand. I did have a young toddler that did not have many words. To her I was mama from the very beginning.

My two year old calls me 'mom' or 'momeeee'. I feel it's important to her to have that 'mom' in her life - especially because her bio mom has been MIA for two+ months and may not be ever coming back. A mother is important and, for all practicality, I am her 'mom'. For an older child, they could call me whatever they want - as long as it's polite and respectful, of course.

We have always had older kids, so went with our first names seeing as the kids knew that we werent actually mom and dad. But when our first met our now adopted daughters they first thing called us mom and dad, but they were in a home where they called the fp's mom & dad.

Just wanted to share : I had a 4 year old and she called me "first name"...after some time in my house, she stood infront of me, hands to her hips and declared : I wuff you, I call you MOM so there lol. Still makes me smile:)

My FD calls us mommy and daddy. When she came to us every female was mommy so she continued with me. We now have it down to just me being mommy and unfortunately she doesn't recognize her mother anymore so she doesn't call her anything.