When you make the decision to not adopt again...

i adopted DD#1 when i was 42. i started on the second one when she was 2y. well starting into year 5-i was tired of putting my life on hold-saving PTO, saving money, etc. i gradually started giving things away. it was hard. but we went to disney. i made some investments in my house. i was going to let my homestudy expire this past October and be happy with one child but it wasn't what i wanted. i was worried because at this time DD was 7years old. i got a call for a baby the week DD1 turned 7yo. i really had to think about it because i had emotionally let go. while i worry that i'm now in my late 40's i'm glad i said yes. she definitely has her big sister. i'm not trying to say you should hold out no matter what. but i do understand that process of letting go. and i did grieve. it's a process. hugs. you will know what to do.