Need info on adopting after permanent guardianship

Has anyone done this? What is the process like? Do parents have to consent? If they DON'T consent how hard is it? We have PC of Xena and would like to formally adopt her after a year ( were told you had to wait a year before filing). Xena has rare bio parents who TRULY care about Xena'sbest interest, even over their own. I know they've never liked the idea of her getting adopted and losing all parental rights because they are afraid of never seeing her again. We have a good relationship, I actually like her parents, I think they know I'd never keep her from them now. I don't know how to approach adopting her to them though. I don't want to take them to court and have the judge terminate, I'd rather them relinquish. Not only because it would be a messier process but also because i think it will look better on them to relinquish voluntarily. I think they would if they felt its in her best interest. What are some reasons its better on the child to be adopted vs guardianship? In our state, if we are to get kinship financial assistance for Xena they will go after her biological parents for child support. I think that is great in some ways, and for some situations but they already struggle to feed their family. While Xena is a money drainer(lol) we still pay our bills just fine and are not struggling. We have had to cut back on extras since since getting guardianship but we are doing well enough financially that I can't bring myself to take any money from hem whether we are legally allowed to or not. I believe we would still get an adoption subsidy if we were to adopt after guardianship because she is special needs. Does anyone know of that's true? I would love to put her in some extra fun stuff (like toddler gymnastics) but like I said, she is an expensive kiddo. We spends *hundreds* of a dollars a month on gas alone to get her to all of her appointments and visits (we are allowed to cut back on visits but don't want to). I WANT to give her parents some good reasons why adoption is best but I want to give her accurate reasons.Here are some I'm thinking of:*Can change her last name so she isn't set apart from us*Will not be raised by "legal guardians" but by "legal mom and dad"* financial help so she can do more fun stuff (I wouldn't normally want to list money as a reason but I KNOW her parents and think this would be important to them, they want her involved in a lot of fun activities, vacations, etc. they love that we "spoil" her) I am not 100% sure we qualify for Adoption subsidy though since she is no longer a foster child. I think we do though.I'm drawing a blank for any more reasons. Help!ETA they have cognitive delays and I am not sure they will quite understand the concept that adoption is offering more permancy to her and that is a GOOD thing and kids need that permancy. This is my biggest reason for wanting to adopt and I'm just not sure they will get it.

From my understanding according to my paperwork , the rights they retain with guardianship as opposed to giving up parental rights are 1. Right to choose religion (we are on the same page so not an issue) 2. The right to visitation, at my discretion (open adoption is not enforceable in our state but with guardianship they maintain supervised visitation rights). We go above and beyond and I think they know that. We do it for Xena because she loves her parents, we wouldn't change that because we adopted her. We also do it because we like her parents and want them to stay involved with her. 3. The right to consent to adoptionThe way I see if what they "lose" in all this is the right to visitation, they will have to trust that we won't keep her from them. They also lose any financial obligation to her. How bad does it look on them if they relinquish her? Will that be held against them? I know its better than a judge terminating...Am I missing anything?

We did a private adoption after permanent guardianship. We waited a year because in our state no contact or no child support for one year were grounds for TPR. We hired an attorney who filed for involuntary TPR on grounds of no child support, it was not contested. When we took perm. custody his case with CPS was closed so we dont get any kind of adoption assistance.

That is very helpful! Xena's parents haven't paid child support BUT we haven't filed for any. They also DO have contact. I hate the idea of filing for Child support but will have to think about it.

Was your child special needs? I'm in your state so we probably won't get any AA either then. I never thought we would but someone told me we still would. I will need to figure that out. I have a relative who is getting permanent custody of kinship placement and then adopting after, they will get AA they already have paperwork for it. She is also in our state.

I highly recommend our adoption attorney for several reasons. She will get Xenia what she needs $ wise. Ohio law states adoption subsity must be less than foster stiplen (not sure How a year of guardianship would affect that?) our lwayer got AD's subsidy $1.80 less than her foster stipent. She could also get a mediator or councilor to talk to X's bios about why adoption is best. Wanted to add, Xenia will start preschool before you know it and all throughout school having your last name will make things less confusing for teachers and peers. Especially since she doesn't look like you;)Very excited for the possibility of adoption for you!!

I still have your adoption lawyers info saved! I don't want to start shelling out money until I know if its going to be possible or not though. I'm trying to figure out if she will even qualify for any AA since she is no longer a foster child. I've heard mixed things. I put an email into the state rep that I found on NACAC's website so hopefully that will help. I obviously will adopt if we don't get any AA still, just hoping her parents will agree to it.Eta If they can get a mediator to talk about why adoption is best that will be very helpful! I know they want what's best for her. I am so scared to spend money on a lawyer and have it fall through though, guess I need to get over that. I gave your lawyers name to a friend who will e adoptin soon :)

In my experience, you don't pay the lawyer until they have completed the job? I could be wrong? I know we didn't get the bill until a moth after adoption was complete. Yeah I don't know about the guardianship part either?? Between our AW and attorney, they handled most of the adoption details for us.

We talked to our attorney about this exact scenario with Peanut...we are in Ohio...the non-payment of child support would be our main way to adopt...and we had a huge discussion about it because I know she could not pay and they would probably not give an order for it. So this is what he told us: We would not ask for support. Because if they ordered ZERO our petition was dead in the water. But the court feels it is a given that parents should pay some sort of support and even without an order to do so - it will count against them. (I hope I am explaining this right)So don't go get a court order for support. Because they might say they don't have to do it. Finally - you don't have to tell them this but if you aren't able to adopt - you can legally have her name changed to yours...

[QUOTE=Loving4ward] So this is what he told us: We would not ask for support. Because if they ordered ZERO our petition was dead in the water. So don't go get a court order for support. Because they might say they don't have to do it. Totally agree with this ^^ We didnt ask for support, we were advised not as well. As for your other question our son was premature and drug addicted at birth so he was considered special needs when he was placed as a foster child with us. Since we did a private adoption we didnt qualify for any AA but that was a few years ago so it may have changed by now.

Wow, thanks everyone! I am so glad to hear from people in state who have dealt with this! I am not going to file for child support, I just don't want to get on a bad foot with her parents and feel like they will eventually let us adopt. Going to work up the nerve to talk to them, in the meantime, buckeyemom, you are probably right about the lawyers! I have never had ANY experience dealing with lawyers so I am pretty clueless. May give her a call sooner rather than later!

I did NOT know this, how do I go about this?

I found this website...[url=http://info.legalzoom.com/change-minors-last-name-ohio-20543.html]How to Change a Minor's Last Name in Ohio | LegalZoom: Legal Info[/url]For us - we had to pay our attorney a retainer and then he billed us when we went beyond that amount. Had we not reached it then he would have refunded it. We have spent way more than that though....

I stand corrected. I forgot that yes, we did pay a portion the first time I talked to the attorney. Think it was $500. The rest was due post adoption. That's another thing with guardianship, DCS in our area pays $1000 towards adoption fees. Don't know if you will miss out on that?

So I have 3 daughter with my wife. We have been separated for 6 years but are not divorced yet. The youngest daughter is 19 months but I am not her biological father. There is no biological father on record and I've been their legal guardian for a few years. Theyre morher has lost all parental right. My question is how can I adopt her and should I do this before or after a divorce. I live in Illinois if that matters.