Back story:
My niece has been in the pageant circuit since she was 6 months old. So of course China Doll sees her trophies, sashes, and DRESSES! She only does natural pageants, NO makeup allowed other than lip gloss until the age of 13, there is a contract that all parents must sign otherwise their children will be disqualified.
Well, China Doll has been begging to do a pageant, well the opportunity for her to do one has come, my SIL got an admission waved for doing favors for the director and China Doll has been invited to join.
I've decided to allow her to participate, she knows the walk, the smile EVERYTHING, if she hates it, i'm not out any money because she is borrowing her cousin's dress and i'm not having to pay any fees.
My question is, What are you opinions on NATURAL beauty pageants?
Southernmomma
Just my two cents though.
I want opinions so thank you. I figure I should let her give it a shot at least once. In all honesty, I have no clue how she is going to do, because depending on her mood, she can either be VERY shy, or TOO outgoing.
I just hope she has fun, and then i can brain wash her into loving soccer as much as i do! :eyebrows:
I had thought about putting my DD in our small local pageant when when she was little. But after thinking it over, I really don't like the idea of paying money for someone to judge how pretty my DD looks. I guess if she really wants to do it, I would let her. I would NOT make it a every weekend type of thing like some people do. There are some girls that do a lot of pageants at my kids school and they are easy to spot. It is like they are on stage all the time. My DD is friends with pagent girl who has been taught to rely on her looks, the poor girl has NO sense. Her plan is to marry a rich man when she grows up (she is 17yrs now).
geez thats terrible!! My SIL was a pageant girl and she loved it, but then again some a lot of the pageants my niece does are pretty casual, they just want the girls and boys to have fun.
Last year toddlers and tiaras contacted my SIL because my niece does very well (even though she doesn't do the "walk" she treats it like a fashion show lol) and my SIL told them to go you know where because she didn't want her exposed to THAT pageant life.
Pre-DD, I hated pageants.. I hate how they teach girls to be judged on their outer beauty, to put on a show so people will like them, they give an unattainable goal for looks.
But then I got a princess for a daughter. :eyebrows:
My advice has since changed. If your DD loves the pageantry and you can manage the benefit with minimal negative impact, I say go for it
fwiw - we have not done pageants, but I did do the bippity boppity boutique at Disney.
best of luck making your decision
I have ultimately decided to let her do it only because she has been BEGGING since she could understand what they are.
Last night when i walked through the door the first thing she said was "mommy we have to go to the fashion show!!"
So I will let her do this one, and if she likes it, i will allow her to do more on MY terms.
I too used to HATE them, but after seeing how much fun my niece has, and seeing her wish all of her friends luck and begging her mom to call them afterwards if they have won to say congratulations, my opinion has since changed.
The way my SIL handles them and explains that beauty is not the all importance in the world (she wears NO makeup ever, always dressed down unless a special occasion) is great, she has helped me see that they are not all evil, you just have to know which ones to look for.
I have mixed opinions. I put my son in one as an infant because it was for charity. He actually did very well, especially since he wore overalls and other little boys were wearing tuxs (not kidding!)But, during it I went into the bathroom and there were a bunch of moms and little girls in there. One little girl was crying as her mom was teasing her hair and the mom yelled at her to not mess up her face. Other moms were gossiping about other little girls, how so and so was wearing a dress she had worn before at another pageant or so and so had bought a used dress and was wearing it and also talking about other little girls looks. I was sick to my stomach and we never did another one. On the other hand my daughter's dance teacher did a lot of them growing up, and she says it gave her confidence she was lacking because she was tall for her age. She also ended up earning money which helped her pay for college. She says it was a good experience, though she has not let her daughters do any yet. Another friend who adopted a child through foster care found that her daughter loved pageants and it made her feel good about herself. She doesn't care if she wins, she just likes the getting dressed up and having fun. It's been good for her, because her self esteem was bad and it's been a boost. But, in both of those cases pageants were not all they did or do. The dance teacher did dance and played sports and other things. The little girl does volunteer work (she likes making sure other kids don't go hungry like she did) and she plays sports and loves to read. So I guess take it pageant by pageant and follow your daughters cues. If she seems to be changing in a way you don't like you can stop.
As the mother of 7 daughters (5 of them teenagers) My experience has taught me to support my girls in all their activities. But the catch is with my guidelines. The best example I have is several of my daughters play competitive volleyball. I am NOT a fan of the uniform, especially the bottoms. However, we found a brand that has the legs a bit longer, and as soon as they come off court at the end of the game, the MUST put their sweatsuit bottoms on. NO exceptions! This type of compromise we have done with everything from piano, choir, karate, football etc.
So, go with what works for your family.
Have fun.
I knew a girl who was a runner-up for Miss California. Very nice girl, had done pageants for years. Make-up wasn't an issue in her family because she'd already been wearing stage make-up in her other activities.
Make-up wouldn't be an issue for me, either, as a stage thing -- but then I'm the figure skating daughter of a dancer. Skimpy outfits would be where I would draw the line, personally.
IMO, as long as it's combined with other things, it can give a child the chance to develop poise, etc.
I was in ballet for 6 years an i look back at my stage make up and laugh! I had sooo much blush on but the pictures from the audience you can barely tell, so I understand the stage makeup thing, my belief is that no 4 year old should feel the need to put on makeup to feel beautiful
China Doll did her walk for me yesterday, its all wrong, but its HER WALK, and too freaking cute!!! She smiled and waved and danced and jumped and she had fun, so she may not get most poised, but she sure may get Miss Personality lol!!!
She has invited her baby sitters, her god mother, my bff and god knows who else to her "fashion show" i'll make sure to post pictures next monday
Okay, so we did the pageant
and she enjoyed herself
but she froze when she had to go on stage alone.
But she got a sash and a small trophy so we're happy
But LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT THESE MOMS!
OMG! The way some of these mothers force these kids who want nothing to do with these pageants
But... she had fun... she finally got to do a pageant
moving on to the next adventure :moped:
But Here are some pictures of my beautiful baby
Glad she had fun! You have a very beautiful daughter :)
Sometimes it's better to be able to say 'Did it, but found out it's not for me' than 'I was never able to try it at all'
carmen90
Glad she had fun! You have a very beautiful daughter :)
Sometimes it's better to be able to say 'Did it, but found out it's not for me' than 'I was never able to try it at all'
thats why we did it. I wanted to give her the chance to experience it
She's adorable, just look at that smile!!! Glad she had fun overall and there's nothing better than a trophy, right?
THESE MOMS!??? I hear ya. I don't care what activity/sport your kids join, there will always be THOSE MOMS to deal with. They suck.
I am not a fan of pageants at all, mainly because the main focus is on physical looks. I know they do talents too, but still, if a girl doesn't look good enough (to some standard), then she won't make it far regardless of how well she can dance, sing or spin 20 bowls on sticks. I am a fan of anything that involves learning a skill though and my family is one of performers of music, theatre, dance and the like. I think in the long run,children who are involved in activities that require them to learn something come out better over all because they are doing something that expands their brains, allows them to be expressive and teaches them the value of work and reward. There are always "those Moms" in every thing on this planet. The trick is to find a place that offers whatever type of activity you want, that frowns on those types of people and their bad behaviors.
Pageants aren't for me, watching little girls run and cry off stage because they missed a spin or a wave and their mother screaming at them. Watching girls scream and cry because they DONT want to go on stage.... Infants in can can outfits.... yeah!! NO!!!
I'd rather be THAT MOM on the side lines of the foot ball field, or at soccer practice running around with my kids, of being the loudest proudest mom because my kid just did a dance solo, or hit a home run. I'm a skills mom i think, not a "its about confidence mom (while whispering you need to look perfect)"
CaddoRose
I am not a fan of pageants at all, mainly because the main focus is on physical looks. I know they do talents too, but still, if a girl doesn't look good enough (to some standard), then she won't make it far regardless of how well she can dance, sing or spin 20 bowls on sticks. I am a fan of anything that involves learning a skill though and my family is one of performers of music, theatre, dance and the like. I think in the long run,children who are involved in activities that require them to learn something come out better over all because they are doing something that expands their brains, allows them to be expressive and teaches them the value of work and reward. There are always "those Moms" in every thing on this planet. The trick is to find a place that offers whatever type of activity you want, that frowns on those types of people and their bad behaviors.