Having a bad moment...

I just wanted to send you Hugs...this board has been quiet for a while and hopefully people still check that are actively going through this to chime in. Are there any type of classes that he is taking / will take that will involve cause and effect? That might help him and/or his teachers understand that while some things will come easy to him - other things not so much whether it is an age thing or something else? I can say this that the frontal lobe (?) where good decisions / thought processing happens don't mature in males until around 25 vs much younger for females - if that helps... Kind regards, Dickons

Thank you...I will keep searching for other resources as well. It looked like the board was pretty quiet...And, maybe my personal meltdown(however internal) was worth something...because we ended up talking again and he is open to being evaluated if I really believe it will help him in the long run. I spoke with the doctors office(our pediatrician just retired...but, they had someone to point us to) they think we can get in for an assessment fairly quickly. It's never too late, right? We just need the help of those who understand where he is coming from(and how he thinks) and what he needs to learn to manage day to day life going forward. We will figure this out.Thanks again for the support...I just want so badly to do right by my son.

What is he studying? Computer science is a pretty accepting place for kiddos with aspergers I can imagine how tough this is for you. Its tough for any parents to let kids fend for themselves (thats pretty much what college does). KNowing kids have limitations, makes this near impossible But if it helps, i have several amazing coworkers who made it through college with aspergers. Even at Dell (where we work.. yeah, i know. i gave a detail, but its a big company), they still miss the subtleties, the intent behind words, the facial expressions. But they are valued for what they CAN contribute Temple Grandin has some good books on the subject. How are his grades? Does he seem lost?

So sorry to hear you're having all this overwhelm you right now -- or were when you wrote this. Thankfully you're in the backyard, so to speak of a number of highly talented practitioners of the HANDLE Institute. Their main USA base used to be in Seattle. I know Seattle isn't *exactly* in your back yard, but you are so much closer to people who've worked with for years than most people are. There is a lovely woman who lives I think on Bainbridge Island who'd be perfect to work with about this son. (Different person than the one I mentioned for your little guy.) She is gifted, she's very calm, very slow moving, but can hit a Zoom Speed if needed. I highly respect her, after spending 10 days attending a class where she was one of the teachers. (Let's just say I didn't respect all teachers at the end of it.) She is a marvelous person, truly. The HANDLE drill is that the HANDLE person runs the other person through a series of activities, which are very sophisticated. They then analyze those, perhaps while you're out and about on the town for an hour. They come up with a series of activities to do daily. They show you how to do them. They simply *work*. My little 5yo, tho gifted, could not tell one letter from another, despite practice, not even A from C, so unlike. Within a week of starting his 8 activities, maybe 10-15 minutes a day, he walked up to me with a piece of paper, and his 4-letter name written on it, in order. Not just *seeing* the letters, but writing them. (His eyes had not been teaming.) They deal with Aspie and Autistic people all the time, their specialty. I don't know how to say it exactly, it's not like people are cured, but they move along the spectrum from the outside edge towards normal. They create amazing change. I think you'd benefit from reading this book, to see if Judith's approach resonates with you. I think it will, but better to see for yourself. :-) [url=http://store.handle1.org/book-the-fabric-of-autism.html]Book: The Fabric of Autism <br>(Qty=1 book)[/url] PM me or email if you want her name/info.

Thank you so much for the reply! It is very encouraging to hear about your co workers...I know he can get there! It was a rough few days while I worked to process my own emotions/fears...but, I am feeling somewhat better about it. We actually have an appointment set for December 31st to have him evaluated and start the ball rolling. He sees where having counseling might help with learning to manage the social skills issues. I think if we can just get help that will allow him to find self acceptance and to understand how his mind works in relation to the rest of us "neuro typical" folk, that will make a huge difference! I am also hoping having the formal evaluation done will help us get hooked up with help specific to him as a college student! He wants to study some version of Engineering...would LOVE to just study math for the rest of his life!haha...talks of "maybe a doctorate in math someday...you know, for fun." But, right now we are focused on an Associate of Science Transfer degree and/or Industrial Electronics two year certificate(which would allow him to become a licensed electrician.) I think if we can get past this English component, then he will be up for the transfer degree. But, that piece has really had him freaked out this quarter. Either way, I know he felt more "at home" when talking to the industrial tech director...he came home and said "he sucks at english, too!":arrow: haha...I keep telling him it is ok for english to not be his thing. He actually got all A's this quarter in school. The issue was the one class he took to polish up his writing skills in an attempt to meet the requirements of the running start program. I think we need to just look into getting his GED so we can apply for financial aid(he can't get financial aid without it) and have him focus on what he needs to accomplish without the added pressure of the "program requirements" with running start. That way, he could start in a lower english class as needed and it would be no big deal. Thanks again for the reply. As the title of the post said...I was having a bad moment. :rolleyes: "feeling much better now!" haha

Thank you. I'll email! =)