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My husband and I are in the process of adopting two bio sisters (12 and 14) from foster care. We have had two supervised visits so far, both of which went very well! We are moving forward with more regular visits, but due to the special circumstances of the girls the process is going to be a long one. We are already running out of ideas for visits--we live in the South, and it is so hot outside that we are not able to do any sort of outdoor activities this time of year.
For those of you who have adopted older children, what sort of activities did you find were the most effective use of time for your visits?
what about taking a walk and having a picnic-an amusement park, the mall, roller skating, bowling, going lunch and a movie if the weather isn't cooperating, horse back riding if there is anyplace around you that does that, bike riding, going to a concert that they would like, hanging out at the park, swimming
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Craft projects -- possibly something girly -- can be fun to do in an air conditioned place. You can buy things in a craft store, etc. A bead kit is nice, so the girls can make bracelets or whatever and take them back to their foster home. It's not that expensive, and you can sit with them, "help" as needed, and just observe the interactions. Finish the day with some ice cream, since it's hot.
Bowling is always fun, and the alleys are usually air conditioned.
Have the girls ever been to a museum or a planetarium or a sea life place? A lot of places have fun activities for older kids - like an opportunity to watch a dolphin show, a place where the girls can try out an airplane simulator to see if they'd be good pilots, etc. The girls might even learn something!
If there's a college campus in your area, tour the campus, watch an athletic event, see what a dorm is like. It's a great way to get kids interested in going to college, and you can observe how they behave around teen boys -- could be good, could tell you that you'll have some major adolescent issues to deal with.
If you do any interesting volunteer work, perhaps you could involve the girls. Helping you make sandwiches for the homeless, for example, can cause them to start talking about their own experiences that have brought them to their current situation, and can help you assess their compassion for others.
Towards evening, when it cools down a little, try miniature golf. Make sure you take water bottles with you, just in case.
Make a gift for the girls' foster parents. If they live in a single family home, have the kids make and paint a birdhouse to hang in a tree. There are lots of kits for this sort of thing. If you want to spend the money, have the girls go to a place where they can decorate a piece of pottery, like a mug or a figurine, and where it's then fired so it looks attractive.
If they don't know how to ride a bike, go to a school parking lot, if it's not used on the weekend, bring a couple of bikes and helmets that you own or can borrow, and teach them.
Cook a special meal with the girls. Let them help bake cookies, make mac and cheese from scratch, etc. Let them make some table decorations. Put out the good dishes and silverware. And enjoy (while assessing things like their table manners and their eating habits.)
We are there right now too. Sharon gave you lots of good suggestions. Where are the girls in terms of social/emotional development? They may enjoy things usually associated with younger children as well.
Do you have Michael's Crafts store near you? Stock up on supplies and kits and watch for their discount bins.
Are projects are a favorite at our house. Buy some canvas, paint, and brushes. Also sketch books and colored pencils.
Water balloons, spray string (dollar store for these), and my girls have an amazing capacity to watch favorite movies over and over.
Also, mine still enjoy Build-a-Bear animals, etc with the range of accessories. You can pick these up cheaply on ebay and cragislist.
Craft projects -- possibly something girly -- can be fun to do in an air conditioned place. You can buy things in a craft store, etc. A bead kit is nice, so the girls can make bracelets or whatever and take them back to their foster home. It's not that expensive, and you can sit with them, "help" as needed, and just observe the interactions. Finish the day with some ice cream, since it's hot.
Bowling is always fun, and the alleys are usually air conditioned.
Have the girls ever been to a museum or a planetarium or a sea life place? A lot of places have fun activities for older kids - like an opportunity to watch a dolphin show, a place where the girls can try out an airplane simulator to see if they'd be good pilots, etc. The girls might even learn something!
If there's a college campus in your area, tour the campus, watch an athletic event, see what a dorm is like. It's a great way to get kids interested in going to college, and you can observe how they behave around teen boys -- could be good, could tell you that you'll have some major adolescent issues to deal with.
If you do any interesting volunteer work, perhaps you could involve the girls. Helping you make sandwiches for the homeless, for example, can cause them to start talking about their own experiences that have brought them to their current situation, and can help you assess their compassion for others.
Towards evening, when it cools down a little, try miniature golf. Make sure you take water bottles with you, just in case.
Make a gift for the girls' foster parents. If they live in a single family home, have the kids make and paint a birdhouse to hang in a tree. There are lots of kits for this sort of thing. If you want to spend the money, have the girls go to a place where they can decorate a piece of pottery, like a mug or a figurine, and where it's then fired so it looks attractive.
If they don't know how to ride a bike, go to a school parking lot, if it's not used on the weekend, bring a couple of bikes and helmets that you own or can borrow, and teach them.
Cook a special meal with the girls. Let them help bake cookies, make mac and cheese from scratch, etc. Let them make some table decorations. Put out the good dishes and silverware. And enjoy (while assessing things like their table manners and their eating habits.)
Sharon
Craft projects -- possibly something girly -- can be fun to do in an air conditioned place. You can buy things in a craft store, etc. A bead kit is nice, so the girls can make bracelets or whatever and take them back to their foster home. It's not that expensive, and you can sit with them, "help" as needed, and just observe the interactions. Finish the day with some ice cream, since it's hot.
Bowling is always fun, and the alleys are usually air conditioned.
Have the girls ever been to a museum or a planetarium or a sea life place? A lot of places have fun activities for older kids - like an opportunity to watch a dolphin show, a place where the girls can try out an airplane simulator to see if they'd be good pilots, etc. The girls might even learn something!
If there's a college campus in your area, tour the campus, watch an athletic event, see what a dorm is like. It's a great way to get kids interested in going to college, and you can observe how they behave around teen boys -- could be good, could tell you that you'll have some major adolescent issues to deal with.
If you do any interesting volunteer work, perhaps you could involve the girls. Helping you make sandwiches for the homeless, for example, can cause them to start talking about their own experiences that have brought them to their current situation, and can help you assess their compassion for others.
Towards evening, when it cools down a little, try miniature golf. Make sure you take water bottles with you, just in case.
Make a gift for the girls' foster parents. If they live in a single family home, have the kids make and paint a birdhouse to hang in a tree. There are lots of kits for this sort of thing. If you want to spend the money, have the girls go to a place where they can decorate a piece of pottery, like a mug or a figurine, and where it's then fired so it looks attractive.
If they don't know how to ride a bike, go to a school parking lot, if it's not used on the weekend, bring a couple of bikes and helmets that you own or can borrow, and teach them.
Cook a special meal with the girls. Let them help bake cookies, make mac and cheese from scratch, etc. Let them make some table decorations. Put out the good dishes and silverware. And enjoy (while assessing things like their table manners and their eating habits.)
Sharon
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We have been doing a lot of crafts, and these girls are fast learners! The younger sister used a sewing machine for the first time like she was born to make clothes.