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I have recently had the blessed opportunity to have my birth brother come and stay with me for a week as I was at the point of having a nervous breakdown (for many reasons and long term depression). We stayed up one night talking about what he knew about my adoption. He is 6 yrs younger than me and told me he would push our mum for info once he knew I existed.. Well it came out that my amum was in the same hospital at the same time I was born suffering a miscarriage ( this much I knew already). What also came out was that my bgrandmother (the instigator of my adoption) was talking to my mum in the hopspital... She was the one who signed the adoption papers... And it is sounding like a very quick "here your baby died take this one instead" situation.. I am so angry and hurt. I already knew my bmum wasn't given the choice in my adoption and wasn't allowed to see me during or after the birth... It was 1978... But now hearing it was even more wrong makes me so mad... I have always felt like a possession in my aparents eyes but this makes it even more so in the whole institutions eyes as well... I received a letter from the government yrs ago stating I could revoke my adoption if I wanted and change the birth certificate back but hearing it from my brothers mouth really breaks my heart... Anyone else have a similar situation?
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So glad to hear you are connected with your BB. The story he was told could very well be true. Or it could be what he was told, kwim? It has to be hard, facing your child and trying to explain why you gave their sibling away. Its extremely hard to look back in history and truly see reality from all angles. Enjoy you time with your BB. And, by all means, join usi n being angry at the system
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I'm angry with the system but not for the same reasons. I found out that I was adopted when I was 17 years old and it was a surprise to me. I wasn't angry with my birth parents or adopted parents. What angered me was all the lies that were told to me, my adopted parents and my biological parents. Years later, the truth came out as the truth always does. Secrets also have a way of coming out.