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I am really interested to know what agency you used for your AA adoption. My family is just beginning to pursue transracial adoption of an AA baby girl (not yet known or matched), but we have recently been told that the agency we are currently using is ridiculously expensive (about $32,000). Need a new (AFFORDABLE) agency ASAP and would love to know what ones you guys have experience with. We are in Oregon, and need to find an agency that allows gender specificity because of room constraints. We currently have 1 girl and 3 boys, so adding a 4th boy to the room is not possible. We have plenty enough room for a baby girl though, so it is a necessity that we go that route. Please help.
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Our family has adopted many times. Three of our last four still at home are Black American; our last baby is Black American/Hispanic. We started most of our adoptions through an attorney near us. From there, we found an agency to write our homestudy and networked (ourselves) to find agencies in and out of our state.
It's been awhile since our last baby was born (six years) and I've seen adoption fees grow to astronomical proportions (sadly). I would suggest you start much of the networking on your own to find an adoption situation that's affordable for your family. I'm guessing from your post that you're not bound to adopt within Oregon, correct? If that's true, I would suggest you research agencies/attorneys within states you know you can adopt from......people you may know who live in thase states; places you can stay, along with reputable agencies/attorneys.
It's been our experience that adoptions from attorneys tend to be less expensive. The fact that you want to be gender specific will cause a problem for many adoption entities; though not all. If you are up front and open about what you do and do not want in terms of the adoption----it will be better for everyone (birthparents, agency/attorney, etc). In our case, we were not open to a fully open adoption nor an 18yr communication of semi-open. We were also open to many special needs situations, drug use, etc. We were not willing to go the 'match-route' as we felt this was unfair; rather we requested only 'already born babies'. This meant some agencies didn't even want to talk with us because we were unwilling to put big monies up front for expenses or agency/attorney fees. We did pay some minor fees for our local attorney; but it was clear with any agencies/attorneys we worked with that any additional fees wouldn't be paid until it was known the baby was 'cleared for adoption' (as much as could be from biological parents). We would not agree to pay any large fees (or any) for bparents expenses.
With all that said, we were able to adopt four babies within 8yrs. Our children were born in and out of our home state.
Once you have decided on which states you can adopt from; run off a list from your computer and with pen/paper and phone, call them to inquire what *they* require from hopeful adoptive parents. Some will turn you away immediately; some will welcome you if you're open to special needs or making plans to meet the baby at a moments' notice. Some will keep your profile in their files for any 'just in case' scenario. The bottom line is: Don't get discouraged. You may have to wait longer because of the gender specific qualifier; but it's do-able. Just don't be afraid to phone and talk with any/all adoption entities (though I would strongly discourage you from dealing with facilitators---ir they're even legal in your home state of Oregon.)
Please feel free to pm me if I might be able to help in any way....
Sincerely,
Linny