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So our daughter who is now almost 16 is on FB and her biomom somehow got unblocked (she wanted her blocked for numerous reasons including drug use) and started messaging her, stealing her cover photos, profile photos etc and putting them on her own timeline. Well one day I was signed into our daughter FB account and up popped FB messages from her biomom. My daughter claims her biomom had told her "you are so beautiful!" and that started the conversation. We talked about it...my point was I don't mind her chatting with her but it needs to be monitored because biomom is a drug addict and very narcassistic (she has been diagnosed narcasisstic personality and biopolar and other issues). I'm worried our daughter will be hurt by biomom like her older sister who's 21 and has nothing to do with her now. I'm glad I have an open relationship with our daughter and it was easy to talk to her. Problem with biomom is she thinks her daughter is that 5 yr old naive child she lost. Luckily we raised a strong daughter who knows the truth (which our daughter has told us this herself). So they aren't communicating anymore....however now biomom is posting on her timeline on FB about stuff about "If anyone hurts or hurt my children I will kill them with a photo of a person holding a child and a gun." She's crazy! She is the one whom lost her 3 kids and she posts that? She needs to look in the mirror. I have no respect for her anymore. She tends to blame everyone else but herself for everything and her daughter now sees that. It's just crazy how you can act like that when all along you are the one whom didn't protect your children from abuse!
So, now my concern is she turns 18, biomom decides to contact her again (somehow I don't know). I sure hope our daughter stands her ground and doesn't crumble under all the guilt biomom is going to throw at her. Anyone had to deal with these type of issues? Luckily she's still in Idaho and we aren't. :)
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I'm just going to say that it is clear from your post your daughter has a good relationship with you and you have raised her the past 10 years and she knows what her BM is like. Of course, you will not stop worrying, but it sounds like even after 18, she will talk to you if BM contacts her. I wonder if your daughter would block her on FB so she can't post anything on her timeline. Don't make her do it, just suggest that if it makes her uncomfortable, a short period of no contact might be wise.
side note - I'm so glad to see you here!!! I've missed you
This is that ticking time bomb we both have been fearing since finalization.
It sounds like you handled it well - not only recently, but over the 10 years preparing her for the inevitable
Are you at the place where you want to report those threatening posts? Facebook will take them down, but that means you end up dealing with the repercussions
I totally get what you mean about the child be frozen in the BP's mind. J just came home with crayons in a plastic backpack and a barbie. She's going to be 11 in less than a month! She's into music and electronics. Even though we see her quarterly, each visit is identical to the first
Hang in there. You've done a great job. All you can do is trust your daughter - and be there when she gets hurt <3